Your Lost Coast Outpost has a very hungry friend named Anneke who is this many years old *holds up three fingers*. In addition to being 3 and a cutie patootie, Anneke is also LoCO‘s newest food reviewer — like many bloggers, she works cheaply.

Her first assignment? To navigate the finger food-coveting hordes roaming the streets during last night’s annual Taste of Main Street grubdown in Eureka. Your Lost Coast Outpost followed our bite-sized colleague around Old Town recording her reactions — verbal and facial — and have presented them below (click photos to “biggify”).

Note: To be upfront, Anneke only got to 17 of the 26 participating TOMS establishments because 1) some of the venues were more far flung than others 2) she only rolls veggie and 3) her stomach, like her, has only grown for three years. Please forgive her like we’re trying to.

OK, let’s nom.

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-Lost Coast Brewery-
Anneke Ate: Chips and Salsa
Anneke Sez: “It’s a little bit spicy.”

-Bollywood Indian Cuisine-
Anneke Ate: Pakoras
Anneke Sez: “I like the green one.”
(Note: One of the sauces was very green.)

-Paul’s Live From New York-
Anneke Ate: Pizza
Anneke Sez: “This pizza tastes like apples because apples are red.”
(Note: Logic.)

-The Local Beer Bar-
Anneke Ate: n/a
Anneke Sez: “There only was beer. Whee.”
(Note: The “whee” was more a reference to the speed of the stroller she was in while making the statement than The Local’s beer selection which she did not imbibe.)

-Black Lightning Motorcycle Cafe-
Anneke Ate: Iced Coffee
Anneke Sez: “It tastes like bubbly stuff because it has bubbles.”

-Surfside Burger Shack-
Anneke Ate: French Fries
Anneke Sez: “It tastes like Cinnamon Life.”
(Note: WTF?)

-Kyoto Japanese Restaurant-
Anneke Ate*: Veggie Sushi
Anneke Sez: “I dropped it.”
(Note: After some initial reluctance, Anneke touched the roll to her tongue. But then she dropped it at which point the review was aborted.)

-Old Town Coffee & Chocolates-
Anneke Ate: Fresh Fudge
Anneke Sez: “Like Halloween candy.”

-Oberon Grill-
Anneke Ate: “Savory Bite” (Spanakopita)
Anneke Sez: “Good.”

-Venlo Chocolates-
Anneke Ate: Chocolate
Anneke Sez: “Fishy.”
(Note: Unlike the piece pictured, Anneke’s chocolate was shaped like a fish, hence … right.)

-Living the Dream Ice Cream-
Anneke Ate: Ice Cream
Anneke Sez: “Bagels.”
(Note: She’s referencing the waffle cone, which, apparently, tasted like a bagel to this 3-year-old.)

-Treasure Trove (Sunset BBQ Sauce)-
Anneke Ate*: BBQ Tofu in Sunset Sauce
Anneke Sez: “I don’t want it.”
(Note: Yeah. Wasn’t havin’ it.)

-Los Bagels-
Anneke Ate: A Cookie
Anneke Sez: “Cookie crunchy … sprinkles!

-Ramone’s Bakery & Cafe-
Anneke Ate: Coconut Macaroon
Anneke Sez: “I don’t know. It tastes like rice.”

-North Coast Co-Op-
Anneke Ate: Baguette with Artichoke Spread
Anneke Sez: “I don’t know.”
(Note: She was getting tired at this point.)

-Bella Baskets (Boujie Baking Company)-
Anneke Ate: Beer-Kissed Honey Basil Ale Caramel Sauce on a Pretzel
Anneke Sez: “Cinnamon-y!”
(Note: Maybe she is confused about cinnamon. But c’mon, she’s three.)

-Bella Baskets (Humboldt Hot Sauce)-
Anneke Ate*: Cucumber Round w/ Cypress Grove Cheese & Humboldt Hot Sauce
Anneke Sez: n/a
(Note: Nope.)

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Well done, kid! Check back next year when our 4-year-old friend reviews Taste of Main Street.