“…the freakish riddles … the irresponsible phantasmagoria of an ecstatic”

— Art historian Wilhelm Fränger, writing about The Garden of Earthly Delights

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Last Monday, we spent most of the day in Spain’s “Prado” (Museo Nacional del Prado) one of the must-see attractions, not just of Madrid but of all Europe: over 100 rooms of the best of pre-20th century European art. We tried to absorb as much as we could in a single visit: the Mona Lisa (da Vinci), Naked & Clothed Mayas, and the (chilling) May 3, 1808 Executions (Goya), The Three Graces (Rubens, who loved bosoms), Las Meninas (Velazquez)…But I had to start in room 56A, where I lingered for half an hour or so, meeting face-to-face for the first time a work of art that has haunted me for decades: The Garden of Earthly Delights.

For me — who knows very little about art — this is the weirdest painting ever created. It came from the hand of an artist who lived in the Netherlands about 500 years ago, and of whom we know next to nothing. Jheronimus van Aken, c. 1450-1516, lived nearly all his life in the town of ‘s-Hertogenbosch, taking part of that name for his signature, Jheronimus Bosch. Of the two dozen works confidently ascribed to him, the one known to every student of the strange and wonderful is what we now call, in English, The Garden of Earthly Delights, dated to about 1505.

At first blush, it’s an obvious religious allegory. On the left panel, we’ve got the Garden of Eden; in the middle, a gay old time is being had by all; and finally, having pissed your life away with wine, women and song, you get your comeuppance in a hellish landscape. What’s to explain? According to the many, many art historians who’ve taken a crack at this: everything. Bosch’s visions have no clear correlation with anything that came before, it was, in its time, sui generis, a work unlike any other, with allegories that no longer make any sense.

Left-hand panel

Here we’ve got a youthful God presenting newly-minted Eve to a just awakened Adam (minus one of his ribs, presumably) in the Garden of Eden. Is Adam’s expression one of amazement? (When he went to sleep, there was just himself on Earth.) Or, foreshadowing the middle panel, is it lustful as he ogles naked Eve? Above and below, there’s a whole bestiary of exotic and fantastic animals cavorting: an elephant (monkey on its back) and a giraffe (both barely known to Europeans of the early 1500s), unicorns, assorted three-headed creatures, birds by the score. Not to mention that duck-beaked humanoid reading a book…This all seems a stoner’s view of what an Earthly Paradise looks like.

Middle panel

Art experts disagree on whether Bosch is celebrating sensuality — we’ve been given these human bodies to enjoy to the max; or he’s warning us about indulging in too much of a good thing. In this garden, almost everyone’s naked, and they all seen to be having a great time. There’s a shameless innocence about them: cavorting with each other and with the unafraid animals, splashing in the water, cuddling, eating huge berries. Fishes walk on land while birds play in the water. Black and white bodies mingle. A dolphin-tailed knight rides a winged fish. Spend time with this and you’ll see more every time.

Right panel

Night has fallen and innocence gone. Cities are on fire. Water is the color of blood. Demons are everywhere. People are being massacred, impaled, burned alive. The eroticism of the middle panel has gone — men and women now cover their breasts and genitals in shame. A bird-monster eats a human while excreting another. Then, oddly (as if everything so far isn’t sufficiently odd) a very human face looks askance — a self-portrait, according to one historian, noting the “expression of irony and the slightly sideways gaze…the signature of an artist who claimed a bizarre pictorial world for his own personal imagination.”

Having now spent a little time in the presence of the piece, I’m even more convinced of my initial reaction when I saw a reproduction many years ago: not only is it really (really) weird, but it’s also great fun to pore over and try to figure out what it’s all about. Along with this sneaking feeling: Are we trying too hard to make sense of it all? Was Bosch just messing with us, and now he’s laughing in his grave?

After the joy-killing pandemic years, the Humboldt music scene has made noticeable strides toward healing itself in 2023. Venues that struggled to keep their doors open as a community nervously isolated itself have frequent bookings again and conversations surrounding the safety of gathering in tight, sweaty places seem, at this point, like a distant memory. Fun is out there (if you want it).

Another sure sign that our musical ecosystem is righting itself: There are new bands springing to life vying to provide you with your next Humboldt soundtrack. Take for example The Critics, a quartet of alt rock-loving Fortuna teenagers that have already managed to make a big, impressive noise. Back at the Fernstock 2023 Battle of the Bands in June, the group managed to win $5,000 by besting over a dozen other local groups — stocked with musicians sometimes two or even three times older than them. The kids came to play!

Adding to their budding legacy, The Critics also just released a new, slick music video for their song “Where U Went,” which the Outpost suggests you now watch.

To coincide with the “Where U Went” release, the Outpost wanted to learn a bit more about The Critics. Due to the difficulty of juggling band members’ various schedules — think, like, school and stuff — we opted to submit some questions to the group via email which they were kind enough to answer with some additions from local videographer Justin Grimaldo, the director of the “Where U Went” video.

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LoCO: We appreciate your willingness to answer some questions for us in this format. First, maybe you could just provide some basic biographical information about the band.

The Critics: Our band includes four members — guitarist and singer Sergio Ramirez, 19, drummer Ethan Fuller, 18, lead/rhythm guitarist Josh Fuller, 16, and bassist Aaron Soli, 19. Ethan and Josh are brothers. Sergio and Aaron graduated from Fortuna Union High School (FUHS) in 2022 and are currently at College of the Redwoods.  Ethan graduated FUHS in 2023 and is enrolled in a local barber college. Josh is a junior at FUHS. Sergio and Ethan have been friends since middle school and became friends with Aaron in high school.

Around 2019 Sergio had been playing guitar and wanted someone to drum with him for fun. Ethan decided to pick up the sticks and start learning along with him. Josh had been playing guitar a year prior and was not interested in The Critics project at first. A couple months had past, Josh finally decided to play with them and they enlisted the help from their buddy Aaron to play bass. Once we all played together, we knew we had chemistry and decided to start a high school band. (Josh being in 7th grade at the time).  Our first gig was Wildwood Days in Rio Dell in 2021, we played a skatepark fundraiser that same day. Due to COVID those were the only 2 shows we played together that year.  In March of 2022 we played at The Jam Arcata for the first time and have been consistently playing gigs ever since.  

LoCO: I guess the easiest label to apply to The Critics’ music might be alternative rock, but how do you all define your sound?

The Critics: We definitely describe our sound as alternative rock. In recent years new alternative music has kind of felt more like pop to us, but there is a more rock feel to our music.

LoCO: What are some bands that helped inspire and shape your musical direction?

The Critics: Arctic Monkeys was our biggest influence with the first cover and song we played being Fluorescent Adolescent.  Another favorite band is The Strokes. More recently we have pulled inspiration from Radiohead and Kings of Leon.

LoCO: It feels like there is a new interest among youth in playing music with live instrumentation. At a time when electronic music and DJ culture are so ubiquitous, what made you all want to make this kind of music and why do you think live music is important?

The Critics: Music was always in each of our lives and we have different stories of how music spoke to us. Rock always felt like the coolest genre and there is so much to it instrumentally. A lot of modern pop can seem kind of boring to us, so we really enjoy putting new rock music into the world. Our message to the world is that young talent and rock is still out there and we hope people are inspired by our music in the future. A huge part of our band is playing live and not only is it just the most fun thing you could ever do, it’s how we connect with our fans and create new ones.  (while also making a bit of money) Live music is vital to a band and it’s the best way to get your music out there as well as bringing communities together in a fun way.

LoCO: Tell us about this new video for the song “Where U Went.” Why did you want to make a video for that song?

The Critics: We chose to use “Where U Went’ for various reasons, but the main one is that we believe in it.  We have high hopes of getting our name out there and this song has an interesting and catchy guitar riff that we hope people will connect with.

In December 2022 we released our song “The Noise” to alternative rock stations across the US.  We were pretty excited that 68 stations downloaded our song and we were able to confirm that it was being played across the US.  We plan to release “Where U Went” to radio stations next and wanted a music video to back it up with.

LoCO: Why is making music videos important for bands in 2023?

The Critics: In this age of social media and the internet, having a music video will help in promoting our music.  

Justin Grimaldo: There are so many reasons why music videos are essential in 2023 and beyond. Even if the music video isn’t a “banger,” it still gives bands a chance to express their creativity beyond sonically. A lot of lyricists create these worlds in their heads while writing and music videos are able to express that outside of the song itself. It also lets producers, labels, etc., know that you are serious about what you do. Especially when you put as much as you can into the production of your music videos. There’s the argument that the future of music videos is unclear but I don’t believe that to be the case. If you have a good song, a compelling story, music videos will be watched until the end of time. They are also great for content for social media. They serve so many purposes.

LoCO: How did you all find Justin and what influence did he have on the direction of the final product?

The Critics: Justin saw us live for the first time at Fernstock Battle of The Bands, where we won the top prize.  He reached out to us the next day letting us know that he believed in our band and that if we were interested, he’d love to collaborate with us on a music video.  Due to some previous work we had done with FUHS photo and design, we already had an idea of what we wanted.  We shared our vision with Justin and he ran with it and made it better. Justin directed, filmed, edited, and produced it all in a very short timeframe.  He shared the first draft of the video with us and we were completely blown away.  The “Where U Went” music video is such an accomplishment for us and we are so very thankful to Justin for making it all happen.  We are also thankful to Tex Kelly and Leslie Castillo, who helped on-site, and to Jasmine Younger for being our amazing actress (Sergio’s girlfriend in the video).

Justin Grimaldo: I’ve been around a lot of different bands — bands that put on the amazing flashy show, bands that are so “in the pocket” and bands that just seem to have the whole package but lack something more. That something more is the thing that makes this band in my opinion. You can’t ever really put your finger on it but when you find that “something more” it’s hard to ignore.

I had heard of The Critics but for some reason or another, I was never able to make it to a show of theirs. Then came the Fernstock battle of the bands. I had no clue they were on the bill. What was supposed to just be an outing with the family turned into being sonically stimulated.

I listened to band after band and while every single one of them gave it their all, one stood out above the rest: The Critics. I walked over and basked in that sonic stimulation that I mentioned previously. Riffs in the vein of Foo Fighters mixed with Radiohead, MuteMath, Muse and plenty of others captured my ear holes. I had my camera in hand and with each snap I took, I kept thinking to myself “if these guys do it right, they could go somewhere.” I reached out shortly after they won the Battle of the Bands because I wanted to serve in any way that I could. I believe if the community has something or someone’s to back and they have the tools and resources, do whatever you can to help. What skills I have I threw out there to the band and we ended up creating something great together. I believe in the guys and always will. 

LoCO: What’s next for The Critics? What are the ambitions for the band?

The Critics: Right now we are taking a short break from live performances and focusing all our energy into our next EP which will be recorded next month.  We are excited about this new EP — we believe our songwriting is getting better and better. We have been writing and performing a lot of new music recently and are already planning another full album in 2024. 

Our ambition is to be known enough that we can make a living playing our music.  We’d love to go on tour, especially with another well-known band. We are all best friends and we want it to stay that way.  Our relationship with each other is more important than the band itself.  It’s our friendship and having fun together that makes the band.

LoCO: What do your individual futures look like?

The Critics: We all hope that The Critics is part of our individual futures and we’re ready to see where the band goes.  But if we can’t make a living doing that, then we have our back-up plans. Ethan plans to graduate barber college and work alongside his father at Main Street Barber in Fortuna. Josh hopes to attend a UC and get a master’s degree studying Physical Chemistry or be a music engineer. Aaron’s hope for the future is to pursue music and/or become a professor. Sergio plans to study and teach philosophy and know what it means to push himself past his limits. 

LoCO: Any upcoming shows where people could catch you?

The Critics: We have two shows coming up on October 21st and 31st in Ferndale at Griffin Loch’s Scream-A-Torium Scaregrounds event. We are also working on a show in Arcata with The California Poppies — date to be announced soon.  Best place to find our show schedule is at thecriticsband.com or follow us on Instagram or Facebook. 

LoCO: Anything else you want people to know about your music or the band?

The Critics: Our album, Miserable & Melodramatic, can be found on all streaming platforms and our website.  You can also buy a CD, with an 8-page insert that has lyrics and pictures, at Friends of Sound, The Works, People’s Records, or at our shows.

Early in the year, 1893, my father saw posters and newspapers advertising the world’s fair in Chicago and, being 17 years old, he wanted more than anything to go see this exciting event. His folks did not want him to go but he had saved a few dollars he had earned, packed a few things and headed for the fair.

The first night away he started thinking about his folks and how badly they needed him to help with the farm work. He turned around and went back home. Here is one thing he missed: The beautiful California building and the Humboldt County exhibit at the World’s Columbian Exposition.

The exposition was opened May 1, 1893, and closed October 30, 1893. It was located at Jackson Park on the shore of Lake Michigan.

The plans for the California building were drawn by A. Page Brown of San Francisco. It was a Spanish mission-style building, rectangular in shape and three stories high. It measured 144 feet wide and 435 feet long. The building was of frame construction and the exterior was covered with what was called “staff,” a mixture of fiber and rough cement, having a light gray tint to imitate adobe. The roof was covered with red tile and the building had several towers with flag poles at the top displaying California and American flags.

With the exception of the Illinois building, the California structure was the largest building on the fairgrounds. The formal dedication of this building was held Monday, June 19, 1893, with addresses by California Governor, H,H. Markham, and other notables,

California sent a grand total of 156 train carloads and 37 partial carloads of display material by railroad to the fair at full tariff rates. But, after the close of the exposition, the railroad returned all display material free to original destinations. This advantage was not given individual displays.

On February 19, 1892, the Humboldt County Chamber of Commerce requested $7,500 to finance a county exhibit at the Columbian Exposition. There were other requests for financial assistance from the Board of Supervisors, from groups such as lumber manufacturers and the Board of Horticulturists. These were turned down.

The members of the Board of Supervisors were as follows: Walter Scott, First District, Ferndale; W.J. Swortzel, Second District, Fortuna; John A. Moore, Third District, Blue Lake; H.M. Mercer, Fourth District and Niel Hill, Fifth District, The Clerk of the Board was Oscar Stern. The Board decided to allow $5,000 for the Humboldt County display and donations from firms and individuals amounted to $500, making a grand total of $5,500.

Martha J, Herrick, manager of the Humboldt County exhibit at the 1893 fair in Chicago. Photo via the Humboldt Historian.

Frank A. Wick and John Dolbeer were delegates to the fair convention, held April 20, 1892, in San Francisco. They reported to the Board July 12, 1892, The fair delegates asked that Mrs. Martha Herrick be manager and represent Humboldt County at the Columbian Exposition. She had an extensive collection of local Indian artifacts which she exhibited at the exposition and was awarded a medal for the private exhibit. G.D. Herrick was her assistant at the fair and G.A. Woodcock was part-time assistant. So, with this help, she set up the Humboldt County display.

In the extreme northwest corner of the California building, Humboldt County filled a floor space of 52 by 26 feet, or an area of 1,352 square feet. The unique display had more of an outdoor air about it than any other in the building and was suggestive of the forest and mountain slope, with deer, bear, and other wild animals in the setting.

At the same time, the products of the county were well represented. The entire exhibit from Humboldt County was surrounded by an elaborate enclosure of polished redwood, built of fancy shingled panels up to a height of 4 feet, at distances of about ten feet apart, were light and neatly turned columns, which supported an oddly ornate arrangement of redwood, with the words, “Humboldt County Exhibit” appearing in fretwork and extending entirely across each end. Upon the inner frieze were hung aloft about twenty pairs of antlers, representing nearly every species of deer and elk, also Rocky Mountain sheep from the northern part of the state. Between the mounted antlers were Indian bows and arrows, spears, war clubs and saddles, all used with excellent decorative effect.

Entering from the north, the first feature that caught the eye to the right was a wedge-shaped structure about 8 feet high and 12 feet long, set on end. A broad band of redwood panels surrounded the base, while above was a row of photographic scenes showing the forests and lumber camps of Humboldt County. Above that was a line of handsome panels, comprising the lighter colored woods, such as white cedar, white oak and Douglas fir. And above these was still another row of photographs. Capping the top, or ridge, were a number of bottles of Humboldt County mineral water and three large redwood vases filled with bouquets of grains and grasses.

To the left, a terraced pyramid held on its lower steps crystal jars of fruits and vegetables, with inverted bottles of barley, oats, peas, beans, etc. A line of dainty cylinders of amber and ruby jellies were on the higher steps.

In the southwest corner. irregularly fortified behind short sections of logs from native forest trees. was an imitation “rockery” that attracted much attention. There was a mound of mimic rocks. set with patches of real moss and tufts of genuine ferns and native shrubbery. Beneath was a good sized cave and, at the mouth. stuffed specimens of Humboldt County’s fauna peered forth, the most prominent being a huge stuffed grizzly bear. Indian baskets, shells, wood specimens, photographs and other items were thrown lightly down upon the moss at the base of the rockery.

Elsewhere, within the enclosure, was a variety of displays, including a section of redwood tree, 16 feet in diameter; a splendid board of redwood burl, 8 by 4 feet; a cabinet of burl and laurel woods; an interesting cabinet of minerals; samples of leather and leather work; a miniature museum of curios and Indian relics; a glass case containing a garland of flowers formed of shells; vases, urns, plates, knives and forks made from native woods; elkhorn and whalebone chairs; specimens of large and small fish in alcohol; sun-dried specimens; vegetables of unusual size in jars of clear preservative solutions; grain in sheaf and seed; wool and other commodities.

The manager of the exhibit devoted much of her time to giving short talks or semi-lectures to visitors on different features displayed, especially those relating to the early Indian tribes, their habits and history. Together, with curios in general, and facts bearing upon the value of the forest of Humboldt County, newspapers and other descriptive literature were distributed.

After the exposition closed on October 30, 1893, the California Commission tried to give the California building to the Park Commission of Chicago for a museum, but the Park Commission declined the offer because the building was not permanent enough to house valuable displays. An agreement entered into between this commission and the executive offices of the World’s Columbian Exposition stipulated that California should be given free use of the tract allotted but that the building should be removed at the expense of the California Commission and the grounds restored to their original condition for park purposes. All this was to be completed by May 1, 1894.

Most of the salvage companies of that day wanted several thousand dollars to remove the building. Finally, a contractor offered to pay the Commission $560 for the building and this offer was accepted and the job of removal was completed.

Mrs. Herrick closed the Humboldt County exhibit and supervised the shipping of material back home. Meanwhile, her allowance had run out a few weeks before and not having sufficient funds with her, she sold part of her own Indian collection to collectors in Chicago in order to raise enough money to return home.

On June 10,1894, her bill for an additional expense of $110 was submitted to the Board of Supervisors. They did not consider it to be a justified charge, so they turned it down.

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The story above was originally printed in the July/August 1985 issue of The Humboldt Historian, a journal of the Humboldt County Historical Society, and is reprinted here with permission. The Humboldt County Historical Society is a nonprofit organization devoted to archiving, preserving and sharing Humboldt County’s rich history. You can become a member and receive a year’s worth of new issues of The Humboldt Historian at this link.

It is with loving memory we announce that Dorothy Darlene Mello born June 17, 1946 passed away September 15, 2023 in the late hours of the morning after having a severe stroke.

Dorothy was born in Scotia, the second daughter of a family of five, to Joe and Audrey Mello, and was raised on a dairy farm where she grew surrounded by her family and all the animals of the farm. Taking care of the animals became her life’s love. She went to grammar school at Bayside in Arcata and Plaza school in Willows, Calif. when the family moved there in 1956, and in British Columbia when the family moved there in 1961.

In 1964 the family moved back to Humboldt County and settled in Blue Lake just before the big flood. Dorothy became the helper that was always available at the right time. She helped keep the house with her mother Audrey and when her sisters needed her to help with their kids’ cleaning and rearing, she was there then too. She became affectionately known as Doe Doe when her nieces and nephews couldn’t pronounce Dorothy. One after the other they picked up the nickname and she loved it. Dorothy was there when life went full circle and she moved back home to take care of mom and dad at the end of their lives. There was always someone who benefited from Dorothy’s generous and loving help.

Dorothy also had many hobbies. In her young life she used to paint by number and she showed 4-H livestock. She was an excellent horsewoman her whole life, from the time she took up Dad’s horse Peggy to herding cattle in Canada to parade riding on her beautiful horse Sally. She also had many years showing her prize winning silky chickens at all the local fairs until she won all the titles she competed in.

Dorothy was a loving daughter, sister, aunt, great-aunt, and great-great aunt. We will all miss her very, very much, and so will Brownie the dog and Bob the bird.

Dorothy is survived by her brother Joe Mello Jr and his wife Teresa and their sons Kevin and Jeff Mello and wife Staci. Her sister Barbara Mello-Wolf and her sons Aaron Bednar, Travis Mello and wife Ariel and daughter Florence, Kyle Wolf and Faith Houck-Wylie. Her late sisters son Sonny Pedrotti. Her goddaughter Diane Reeves and brother Joe Spencer, and many great and great great nieces and nephews.

A family celebration of life will take place at a later date.

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The obituary above was submitted on behalf of Dorothy Mello’s loved ones. The Lost Coast Outpost runs obituaries of Humboldt County residents at no charge. See guidelines here. Email news@lostcoastoutpost.com.

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PREVIOUSLY: After 50 Years in Eureka, Humboldt County’s Last Denny’s Will Close May 31, Soon to be Replaced by an IHOP

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Keep your syrup warm a bit longer, corporate diner fans: Your Cinn-A-Stack® Pancakes and Hand-Crafted Cali Roasted Turkey Melts are still coming, but the opening of an IHOP in Eureka has been delayed.

Back in May, when we reported that the Denny’s on the corner of Fifth and C streets would be closing after half a century in business, then-owner Safar Ghaffari assured both customers and his own employees that the restaurant would be closed for only about four to six weeks while Denny’s crawled into its cyclone fence chrysalis to transform into a beautiful IHOP.

Alas, four months later, here we are with nary a rainbow sprinkle, let alone a heaping stack of buttermilk Cupcake Pancakes.

Reached by phone a few weeks back, Ghaffari sounded a bit annoyed by the delay, which he attributed largely to bureaucratic red tape from the City of Eureka.

“If I knew what I know now, I would have rolled the dice and kept [Denny’s] running in the summer season,” Ghaffari said.

He sang the praises of the incoming IHOP franchisee and promised to pass our contact info along to him, but we never heard back.

A message sent online to IHOP Media Relations yielded the following reply: “This restaurant is expected to open by the end of the year. We should have more information in a couple months.”

This afternoon, a hungry LoCO reader reached out via email to say he heard a rumor that the delay is due to the ongoing conflict between Security National CEO and parking lot stan Robin Arkley II, on the one hand, and the City of Eureka’s plans to build affordable housing, on the other. So we reached out to Eureka City Manager Miles Slattery.

Not Arkley-related at all, turns out. According to Slattery, the new franchisee has been issued a permit for their exterior IHOP sign and another permit for facade improvements. 

“Right now [the new operators] are taking out the outdoor patio,” Slattery said. “Then they’ll do the facade improvements, then the interior.”

The interior remodel sign required a building permit, which required a public hearing. The hearing has taken place, though Slattery said he wasn’t sure whether the permit has yet been issued, but the IHOP operators are motivated.

”We know they’re in a hurry because all the other stuff was time-sensitive for them,” he said.

As for an opening date?

“I would be guessing two months,” Slattery said.

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During this week’s regular meeting, the Humboldt County Planning Commission took its first look at a draft ordinance to regulate short-term rentals in unincorporated areas of the county.

The proposed rules, which have been in the works for several months, would provide a regulatory framework for the permitting and operation of short-term rentals (dwelling units that are rented to guests for 30 consecutive days or less, through services such as Airbnb or Vrbo) to avoid adverse impacts to the county’s available housing stock.

The goal of the ordinance is to “protect the values of the community,” Keenan Hilton, an associate planner with the county Planning and Building Department, explained during Thursday’s meeting. “In particular, prevent[ing] the loss of housing stock … and preserving neighborhood quality.”

On the other hand, Hilton said, short-term rentals offer economic gain for property owners who aren’t interested in renting to long-term tenants. “There are hundreds of members of our community that are involved in this industry and have invested a lot in it.”

Of the 34,093 residential units in unincorporated Humboldt County, approximately 567 are being used as short-term rentals. “That number constitutes 1.66 percent of the total housing stock of the county,” Hilton said. 

The draft ordinance differentiates between specific communities and separates the greater Humboldt Bay region – “where housing availability has been impacted and housing costs have risen ahead of the pace of wage growth” –  from the rest of the county, according to the executive summary of the ordinance. To ensure short-term rentals don’t overwhelm the Humboldt Bay region, the total number of permits would be capped at two percent of the total housing stock.

“If the number of permits issued for existing short-term rentals exceeds the cap … then no permits will be issued for new short-term rentals until the number of permitted short-term rentals in the county falls below the cap,” Hilton said. “So, if through attrition the number drops down below the cap at that point, we would accept new applications.”

Who is considered “existing” under the proposed rules? Anyone who establishes a short-term rental before the ordinance goes into effect.

“Optimistically, that’s in December of this year,” Hilton said. “If you established your operation in November, you would be considered an existing operation as it’s written right now.”

The draft ordinance notes that no permits will be issued during the first two months following after it goes into effect, but interested parties can still apply. “Two months after the effective date of this ordinance the department will issue permits for qualifying locations with existing short-term rentals,” the document states. “If the number of permits issued for existing short-term rentals exceeds the cap … then no permits will be issued for new short-term rentals until the number of permitted short-term rentals in the county falls below the cap.”

The draft ordinance would also limit the number of rental permits for a single property owner to no more than five parcels.

Speaking during public comment, Lissie Rydz, founder of the Do Nothing Society, an Arcata-based community engagement project, called attention to the county’s housing crisis.

“There is a monumental housing crisis happening right now,” she said. “I just checked Craigslist and there are only, like, 300 rentals on Craigslist. There are 150 Airbnb rentals right now, today. … My first rental in 2011 in downtown Arcata was $550 [per month] for a studio, a big studio. I saw last year that the same place is $1,300. … I’ve met so many people that I didn’t expect [that are] sleeping in cars. … This is it hurts me a lot to, like, hear all these stories and to not feel like there’s enough being done.”

Arcata resident Raelina Krikston presented several data points to illustrate why property owners would be incentivized to list properties as short-term rentals rather than long-term rentals. 

“[In] Arcata [there are] 237 listings, each generating an average of $41,000 a year,” she said. “Eureka with 277 listings, each one of these generating an average of $43,000 a year. McKinleyville, with 154 generating $54,000 a year. And Trinidad with 157 listings. Each [short-term rental] in Trinidad generates an average of $83,000 annually, and has an occupancy rate of 74 percent. So again, it’s easy to see why property owners would choose to list their properties as short-term rentals based on this income potential.”

Speaking on behalf of the Humboldt Association of Realtors, Bernie Garrigan, a real estate broker with South Fork Real Estate, asked the commission to delay its decision on the short-term rental ordinance.

“The complaint process [outlined in the ordinance] specifically seems to lack any sort of guidance or implementation as to what quantifies as a complaint,” he said. “Our recommendation overall is to delay any sort of adoption of the short-term [rental] ordinance until we can totally fulfill – with clarity – what measures would need to be taken to protect community members and their rights and property owners.”

Jessie Reichenbach, a local short-term rental operator, urged people who are concerned about the proliferation of short-term rentals to consider both sides of the issue.

“I lost my dad about five years ago to cancer and then I got diagnosed with cancer last year,” she said. “[I] went through several surgeries over the winter to try and remedy that. … We started renting out our home when I was going through the surgery so I didn’t lose my home, and now we are planning on living out of the county for just a year or two while we spend time with our remaining family members. It’s not greed and it’s not always us trying to invest and then make the money somehow, we’re just trying to cover our mortgage so we can come back once we’re back on our feet financially and live in the home that we love.”

As the meeting approached the four-hour mark, Commission Chair Noah Levy said he’d have to cut public comment short due to time constraints. “What are our options for moving forward on this?” he asked.

“Our plan is to bring this back on Oct. 5,” said Planning and Building Director John Ford. “I was thinking, because you really didn’t get a chance in [this] workshop to really make comments or explore things, we could continue the workshop [on] Oct. 5 and we can put that on first on the agenda.”

Commissioner Brian Mitchell asked if the commission would be willing to hold a special meeting on the topic. “I strongly feel like we need to have a separate meeting directed solely for this,” he said. “It’s not fair to have so many people waiting on topics that are completely not germane to what they’re interested in. And it’s very hard for us to switch gears between all these different topics.”

Ford noted that staff has agendas “projected through the end of the year” and said an extra meeting would be a viable option if the commission was open to it.

After some additional discussion, the commission unanimously agreed to continue the workshop to Oct. 5.

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Stepping inside of ¡Hey Juan! Burritos for the first time in probably about 20 years, I was instantly transported to my high school days when I, like many Arcata High and HSU students, frequented the tiny restaurant in Northtown Arcata. Back then the place was known for its laid-back, party-friendly atmosphere and its heaping portions of fairly inexpensive food. It was also known for its food being, well, not very good. 

Oh, and the cinnamon. Who could forget that the beans tasted so much like cinnamon? 

But apparently those large, messy portions of cinnamon-seasoned food were enough to keep people coming back, because the business has continued operating since it first opened more than 40 years ago, making it somewhat of an Arcata institution. 

Now, current owners Matthew Pipis and Scott Henderson have been making some big changes over the last few years that they hope will make the community view the famous !Hey Juan! food in a different way. 

“I’d tell somebody I bought Hey Juan’s and the first thing they’d say is ‘Oh, that’s the place with the death paste’ and ‘Don’t the beans taste like cinnamon?’” Scott Henderson, co-owner of ¡Hey Juan!, told the Outpost during a recent interview at the restaurant. “Those are always the two things!”

¡Hey Juan! Burritos, most commonly referred to as Hey Juan’s (like with many names, people seem to like adding an extraneous apostrophe “s” ), was first opened in 1982 by James “Gavin” Embry, who ran the restaurant for 33 years. Embry, who was originally from Panama, was an accomplished mountain climber and world traveler and is said to have started the restaurant using some recipes that he brought back with him from his travels in South America. Embry spent a lot of time at the restaurant and even lived in a small apartment behind the kitchen. 

In 2002 ¡Hey Juan! was taken over by an employee of Embry’s, Stormy Mcmakin, who ran the restaurant for the next 15 years. After Mcmakin came down with a serious illness, she decided that it was time to step away. 

Pipis had been a regular at !Hey Juan! since he first moved to Arcata in 2007 from Roseville to attend Cal Poly Humboldt (then HSU) and was a big fan of the cheap food and cheap beer. Pipis had no previous restaurant experience, he said, but he had dreamed of eventually owning his own restaurant. 

Then in early 2018 Pipis was invited to participate in the BIG Chili Cook-Off in Blue Lake, an annual event put on by Mad River Brewing Co. to benefit Big Brothers and Big Sisters of the North Coast. Pipis said that he had no plans to enter the cook-off, but a friend of his who worked for the City of Blue Lake called him on the night before the event and said they needed another contestant and asked if he could do it. Pipis enthusiastically accepted, before he learned that it meant he would have to cook seven gallons of chili that night! 

So, he contacted Henderson, who did have cooking experience, to help him. Pipis said he really did not know what he was doing and started by actually Googling “how to win a chili cook-off.” After finding some information on the magic formula for a winning chili, he bought the ingredients and the two managed to cook a huge batch of chili and enter the event. Much to their surprise, the formula worked and Pipis and Henderson won the 2018 BIG Chili Cook-off. 

“[We competed] against a bunch of restaurants,” Pipis said, jokingly. “So when we won, we had big heads.”

Hot off the win, Pipis decided that it was time to make his restaurant-owning dream come true and offered to buy !Hey Juan! from Mcmakin. He offered to work shifts at the restaurant so that it could stay open, and asked that, in exchange, Mcmakin teach him how to run the business. Pipis hired a lawyer to help with the transfer process and said that his lawyer even advised him that the restaurant was probably not a good investment. But Pipis really wanted to move forward, and on May 12, 2018 he and Henderson became the official owners.

You might think that taking over an already established restaurant would be relatively easy, but this was not the case, Pipis said. With the transfer of ownership, the restaurant had to undergo a new inspection and the health department handed the owner a long list of violations that needed to be corrected to bring the restaurant up to code. The biggest challenge, Pipis said, was that the restaurant didn’t have enough square footage for a commercial kitchen. But Pipis managed to convince the owner of The Hutch, which is directly next door, to lease the restaurant a section of the store’s space. After knocking a hole through the wall, they were able to install a walk-in cooler to add the necessary square footage. 

After managing to make all of the necessary changes, Pipis and Henderson were ready to reopen !Hey Juan! And, at first, things were going pretty well. Of course, the business hit another roadblock in 2020 when COVID forced everything to close down. Pipis said that he, like many folks, had a pretty hard time dealing with lockdown and was feeling discouraged about the decision to take on the stresses of running a business. But it also gave him some time to rethink the business and when things started opening back up again, Pipis and Henderson decided it was time to make some changes to help the business thrive. 

“We realized we’d been using these same recipes,” Pipis said. “We decided to have a chef, who’s a friend of ours, come in and go through our whole menu and take a look at our food, and we changed some of our processes.”    

Pipis and Henderson tweaked some of the more than 40-year-old recipes and started prepping their food in small batches, cooking their meat, beans and rice daily. They also developed a contract with Cal Poly Humboldt’s dining services and opened a second !Hey Juan! location at The Depot on campus. At first, Henderson said, they had to make the food and staff the location themselves. But last summer they penned a “licensing contract” with the university’s dining services, which basically means that the owners are given money for the use of the ¡Hey Juan! name and recipes, but Humboldt Dining provides its own staff and supplies.

Pipis and Henderson also started a product line of sauces and spice blends, which are already available for purchase at The Depot location and will soon be available at some local grocery stores including the North Coast Co-op and Murphy’s Markets. 

Though they’ve made a lot of changes, Pipis and Henderson still want to keep the original !Hey Juan! spirit alive. The famous Death Paste is still the original recipe, and although their food prices have gone up, they still try to give a hefty portion, with each burrito weighing one and a half pounds. It was also important to them to keep the beer prices low, and they claim to have the cheapest beer in town, with $2 pints of PBR and $3 pints of all their other beers. They also still make the famous mimosas, which are $6 a pint. 

And as for the notorious beans, Henderson said that they do still put in some cinnamon, but it’s about one quarter the amount of the previous recipe and is much more balanced and not overwhelming in cinnamon flavor. And I can attest to this, because I ordered a burrito and could not detect any cinnamon! And I have to say, I did not miss it. 

So if you long for the same !Hey Juan! food that was there when I was a teenager – a huge, messy burrito that immediately fell apart when you tried to eat it and tasted a lot like cinnamon – then you might be disappointed. And Pipis and Henderson said that a few old-timers have not been too happy about the changes, but when they try the new food they usually change their tune. 

“Overall, we get a way better response from the community,” Pipis said. “A restaurant is for serving the community and that’s what we want to do…and now I’m very proud of what we’re serving.”