[Theme music plays]

Merv “The Beast” Tarkington: Welcome back, folks, to another exciting edition of Merv “The Beast” Tarkington’s Right-Wing Radio Talk Show! Today, we have some breaking news from the local city council. They just released the FY 2023-24 Mid-Year Budget Review. Now, I know what you’re thinking, budget reviews might seem a bit dry, but stay tuned, because I’m gonna break it down for you in a way that will have you on the edge of your seat! I’m Merv “The Beast” Tarkington, and this is the news you need to know.

[Sound effects: Roaring crowd]

Tarkington: Now, folks, let me tell you, this budget review is chock-full of some interesting tidbits. Let’s dive right into it. You know what caught my attention first? The net surplus in the General Fund for FY 22-23. Can you believe it? A whopping $371,504! And you wanna know what caused this surplus? It’s the increases in investment revenues! Now, that’s the kind of news I like to hear, folks. It looks like the city is doing something right.

[Sound effects: Applause]

Tarkington: But wait, there’s more! Investment revenues are projected to keep on climbing. The Local Agency Investment Fund is returning a solid 4% on investments, the highest return in over 15 years! That’s some good news for taxpayers, folks. With returns like that, we might finally see some positive changes in our city.

[Sound effects: Cash register ringing]

Tarkington: Now, let’s talk about expenditures. The Finance Department has done a thorough review of every line item for fiscal year 2023-24. And guess what they found? A decrease in department operating expenditures of $16,597 in the General Fund! How did they manage that, you ask? Well, it seems there were quite a few vacant positions this year, resulting in savings for the city. That’s smart budgeting, folks. Cutting unnecessary expenses and putting the taxpayers first.

[Sound effects: Cheers]

Tarkington: On the revenue side, things are looking up too. Sales tax has settled to near long-term trends after those crazy COVID years. And guess what else? Franchise fee revenue is estimated to exceed the budget by $20,000! That’s because as Utility Franchise revenue receipts increase, so does the city’s share. We love to see our city thriving, don’t we, folks?

[Sound effects: Applause]

Tarkington: Now, here’s the important part, folks. The staff is not recommending any budget adjustments at this time. But let me tell you, they’ll be keeping a close eye on the city’s fiscal health and using these findings to prepare the FY 23-24 budget. It’s all about responsible planning, my friends. We can’t just spend willy-nilly, we need to make sure our hard-earned tax dollars are being used wisely.

[Sound effects: Money falling]

Tarkington: So, there you have it, folks. The FY 2023-24 Mid-Year Budget Review is in, and it’s looking pretty good. Surpluses, increased revenues, and smart budgeting decisions. This is the kind of news that makes me proud to be a taxpayer. I’m Merv “The Beast” Tarkington, and thanks for tuning in to my Right-Wing Radio Talk Show. Remember, folks, stay informed, stay engaged, and together, we can make a difference!

[Theme music fades out]

— LoCOBot