[This is the second in our series of SOFT-HITTING sports coverage.]
UPDATE: The Prune Packers apparently bought the team a beer and are reportedly “nice guys.” Please disregard the following.
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Day 3 of the Crabs v. Healdsburg Prune Packers (aka the Bums of Healdsburg) series didn’t even get to nine innings.
Mercy was all the Bums could hope for, and the mercy rule they got, losing by 10 runs in the 8th inning.
Their collective shame was compounded by yesterday’s 10-run loss. They are currently on the bus back to Healdsburg, a depleted and broken husk of a team.
The Crabs’ performance was eclipsed only by the near-perfect Arcata weather, which was apparently only 64F but felt like 74F.
Danger reared its maroon-colored head when a Bum hit fouled into the stands, missing a baby stroller by mere feet. We may never know if it was intentional.
The batboy almost got pegged by an outfield-to-home rocket, but this reporter can’t remember who threw it. For real though, it was scary.
POLL: Are the Crabs the league’s overdogs?
Fan Meadow Bell, who happens to hold season pass #69 in the Crabs’ 69th season, said “Crabs season is here, so I’m happy. The rest is just details.”
Innovative Crabs fans pioneered new beer-storing technology [left] which was at capacity for the duration of the game.
It was Sunrise Rotary’s “Sign Day” at the ballpark, which one Bum supporter made the most of [top]. An official record was set for ‘most kids running the bases.’
From the announcer’s booth: Madeline (sp?) lost her cell phone, which is waiting at the ticket booth with a missed call from her mom. Also, buying tickets online save you time.
To quote famous poet O’Shea Jackson, “Today was a good day.”
By the numbers:
- Attendance: 1,100+
- Children Who Narrowly Escaped Harm: 2
- 50/50 Pot: $726
- Best New World Famous Crabgrass Band™ Jam: “Thriftshop” by Macklemore & Ryan Lewis
- Heckle Of The Day: “There’s no ‘W’ in Prune Packers!” - Bryce G.
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