[Editor’s note: Today your Lost Coast Outpost debuts a new feature called Dronkers’ Deep Web in which KHUM’s Mike Dronkers brings you weird, uplifting, mundane and depraved minutiae from the hinterlands of local webz.

Through DDW, Mike will unveil locally-sourced gems from, but not limited to, Craigslist, Twitter, Reddit and Vine. The headline will indicate NSFW content.

He will visit these sites so you don’t have to.

Email your local Deep Web curios to mike@khum.com or Tweet them to @mikedronkers. -AG]

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Welcome to DDW, where we celebrate the very little things. Today’s entries come from, where else, Humboldt Craigslist. First up, another example of responsible pitbull ownership. 

my dog took a crap in someone front yard - w4w

I was walking towards jacoby creek school with my and you stopped to tell me my dog took a big crap in someones yard. i jyst want to let you know i didnt just ignore his shit n leave it for someone else, i was walking my niece to school and was going to deal with it on the walk back because i ran out of poop bags. it was no where to be found though so if you cleaned it up thank you..

As a pitbull owner i try to be very on top of it because us pitbull owners dont need to give people an actual reason to not like us, we get enough bs as is. 
so again, im sorry and thank you if you cleaned it. 

Go deeper.

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Next, Anne knows you only fail once you quit trying. She’s been flyering Eureka’s phone poles and posting on CL for months because She REALLY wants that singing saw back. And she was THIS close. 

Seeking Musical Saw -w4m- 2 (Eureka)

I’m going to plaster the town until you get back in touch with me. My friend Answered the call for me as I was out of town. I felt such a sigh of relief when you called and said you had my saw. Please get back in touch with me!

It is in a hand made case which I can further describe to you when you get in touch. 

It means the would to me. 

I also am offering a reward of 200$


Go deeper. 

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Finally, Ryan Burns and Andrew Goff both say that this next entry is not shady. 

seeking for work

Hello, my name is Fay. I’m looking for any 215 job such as trimming or growing. if anyone out there willing to hire me please hit me up. I’m 38 5 ft tall, 100 lbs. yes kind of small but hard working. i used to work at humboldt for the past 3 yrs but i got jack and lost all contact list if anyone remember me please email me. seeking for work only no sex thank you very much.

Go deep.

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Listen to Mike Dronkers discuss deep web and other local topics weekdays from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. on KHUM 104.3/104.7.