This week on Humboldt Craiglist:
- Use your plane to fly a brah out to Kansas for a hot weekend
- We’re going to all look out for a teeny skateboard
- Used Sybians are getting cheaper, and you shouldn’t Google that, but that’s not even the weird part
First up: Brah seeks love in exchange for gnar-shredding…
I need a plane ride to Kansas to get laid. (Arcata)
Ok heres the situation. My girlfriend live in Kansas and the skype sex is getting a little old. I really like this girl. I would buy a commercial ticket every weekend but I cant afford that. But If you have a plane you can help! I know I know, youre thinking “this kid gets a weekend of wild sex, but what do I get?” I have a particular skill set to offer so heres my sales pitch.
Have you ever wanted to shred the Gnar? I can help! I am a surfing instructor and have 10 years worth of ocean experience to share. I can provide all the equipment you need to get Radical!!!! Boards wetsuit booties and Ill do all the transportation to get us where we need to go to shred!!! Surfing not really your speed? I can teach you the ins and outs of competitive level swimming as well since my background is in competition swimming and water polo. I can Also offer up lessons in Stand up paddle boarding, private art lessons in wheel throwing pottery, or spearfishing/Abalone diving.
So Hey If you got a plane and dont mind entertaining yourself in Kansas or the surrounding area(cuz you have a plane) for a weekend, do a good thing and help a guy out. Come on, its for a real good cause.
Secondly, what kind of depraved maniac would even do this? Let’s right this wrong, people…
Skateboard Thief: (Toby & Jacks, Arcata)
On Saturday night you stole my boyfriend’s Penny brand skateboard from Toby and Jacks. It is teal/green with yellow wheels (though I know YOU know that, I’d like readers to be on the lookout for it as well). I am offering a REWARD for its return. It was my Christmas present to him 2 years ago and it is his only form of transportation.
PLEASE RETURN IT, no questions asked, and you will be rewarded. Thank you.
P.S. Craigslist community—please be on the lookout for this skateboard, and please email me if you see it, with a description of the thief. Thank you!!
(This picture is of the skateboard. It’s a very small board. Sorry about the cat part, it’s the only picture I have of it)
Lastly, it looks like this device had no takers on its initial asking price of $1400.
Naturally, this is listed in “sporting goods” on Humboldt Craigslist…
“the sybian Machine” example carmen on howard stern - $999 (eureka)
if you don’t know what this is, check out you tube carmen electra on howard stern, this is the machine you want for your woman TRUST ME! if you are single, you wont be just post you have this. if you are in a relationship and you want this woman to never leave you, this is the machine. its like owning a harley for your bedroom.
Now this would be a perfectly acceptable DDW. But if you look in the CL “barter” section…
sybian machine if u don’t know look it up - $1400 (eureka)
weird story but my dad bought this for my mom and she said hell no. so one day my dad hears of this new thing Craigslist , so he asks me to sell it for him. they have a bunch of attachments you can buy for it. open to trades as well ps4 sony t.v. led lights, cash, let me know what you got. obo i think it should be worth at least half of what they paid so i want at least 700 of something.