Last week, I attended two, count ‘em, two! back-to-back blenders: The Garberville-Redway Area Chamber Mixer on Wednesday and the California Cannabis Industry Association (CCIA) Networking Mixer down in Sacramento on Thursday. I mixed, I mingled. My elbows got rubbed bare.

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Garberville, sweet Garberville. Last Wednesday’s KMUD-sponsored chamber mixer was at the Veterans Hall, that staunch, unnameable-shade-of-green boxy outpost behind Sicilitos. There was a table full of bomb food at this event, a big chocolate torte, some pie, homemade goat cheese, honey, cookies. .. lots of deliciousness. And the wine station was chock-full of Briceland Vineyards wine. Did I already say “bomb”?

While I imbibed some rich, delicious Zinfandel, a few people got on the mic to talk biz — Cinnamon Paula from the G-Ville Chamber and Jack Frybulous from KMUD, other local movers and shakers too. Raffle prizes were awarded. Paul Simon tunes played off an iPod + speaker set-up. The local and homemade goodies got devoured. Wine was consumed. I had a good time, plus a couple of bizarre conversations. Gotta love Humboldt.

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On Thursday, I headed to downtown Sacramento for the CCIA mixer — a “Cannabis Banking Event,” complete with live music, political updates and a speaker from the California Bankers Association. The mixer was held at the RailBridge Cellar Penthouse on the 13th and 14th floors of the Elks Tower. Swank digs yo — bright lights, big city. What a contrast to the G-Ville scene.

I arrived at the mixer about halfway through, just in time to catch the tail end of banking compliance officer Brian Scrip’s keynote speech: “The challenge banks face in opening cannabis dispensaries: How dispensaries can prepare for their first banking relationship and how they can sustain that relationship.” Based on the volume of the applause, I’d say it was a good talk.

Thankfully, I spotted a friendly cannabis farmer amidst the applauding crowd. He directed me to the bong that was stationed on the outdoor veranda. So I took in the killer view of downtown Sac and the capitol building while I smoked some excellent cannabis. Then I went straight back down to the ground floor entrance for some space and air while I acclimated to the effects of the bongload.

Out at the street level, I had a great conversation with a homeless advocate named Immanuel. He was pounding the downtown pavement, trying to raise money for a very busy shelter. We talked life. We talked cannabis. Immanuel said he used to mule weed outta Humboldt back in the day. He’s seen some weed trees. Dude knows what’s up. Not exactly a valuable connection in the current canna-biz scene, but an alright guy nonetheless.

Back upstairs in the penthouse, it was all soft chandelier lighting and great big windows, wine barrel tables and leather seating, soft acoustic guitar music and catered food. There were lots of men, some sporting ponytails, most with collared shirts, some with full on suit-and-tie get ups. Yes, like most cannabis events, this networking bonanza was mostly men. But there was a smattering of beautiful women there too.

Humboldt marijuana fan Luke Brunner was my in for this mixer. He is an activist with California Cannabis Voice Humboldt (CCVH) and the general manager at Wonderland Nursery. Brunner was there with an Emerald Triangle posse: Allison Edrington from the Ganjier, Casey O’Neill from HappyDay Farms in Laytonville, Leo Stone from Aficionado Seeds out of Mendo and Jason Beaver, director of development for CCVH.

While my Emerald Triangle associates schmoozed it up with the best of ‘em, I managed a meager mingle with a few folks in the crowd. Here’s the standard opener: “What’s your association with the industry?” At one point, some fellow asked me this, and my response was, “Well, I love weed.” He burst out laughing, slapped me with a belt of it. He said, “That’s hilarious.” I wasn’t trying to be funny.

Herein lies my stoner dilemma: The bulk of my social cannabis experiences have been set in dorky, cliche stoner contexts where I could be goofy and silly. But more recently, I keep having these social cannabis experiences where it’s all about the networking. It’s this constant transitioning from one small circle of people to the next, and within each new circle, I have to explain who I am and why I’m important to know. Everyone’s gotta have a spiel in the canna-biz.

But that’s life, as the saying goes. It’s all about who you know. Mixers are for getting to know the right people, making lucrative and productive connections. Of course, cannabis deals and connections are still being made in the traditional fashion (i.e., by whatever means possible), but now deals and connections are coming together at canned events like this, cannabis industry penthouse networking mixers.

I did meet a number of very nice people in Sac at the CCIA mixer, although I didn’t meet anyone that’s ready to come up north to buy a couple hundred pounds anytime soon. Now that would be a valuable connection. Overall, it was fascinating and pretty fun.

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The next day I had a little time to check out the state capitol building and grounds, and the smell of burnt sage was in the air because Friday was the 47th Annual California Native American Day: “Water is Sacred.” It was a celebration with lots of regalia, informational booths, music and performances. And of course, people were out there mixing, mingling, connecting.

From a modest veteran’s hall in Garberville to a swank penthouse in downtown Sac to the steps of California’s capitol building… It’s like life is just one big mixer. Do you have your spiel ready?