WATCH ABOVE: NBC News Democratic Presidential Debate

Ooh! Something big and important is happening outside of Humboldt tonight which means it’s another great time to resurrect LoCO’s unquestionable method for gauging the public’s opinion — PRESS THE BUTTON: “The Poll with Passion.”™

Choose one! Or many!

How does PRESS THE BUTTON work? Below you will find the entire slate of 2020 Democratic Party Presidential Debate: Night 1 contenders. As you are watching tonight’s proceedings ask yourself, “Which one of these people is absolutely slaying the competition and will take America to the promised land?” After arriving at your answer, find that candidate’s corresponding button and press it. Then press it again. If you think that candidate deserves yet another press, well, you have that option, friend. This is why PRESS THE BUTTON is even more democratic than actual voting — if you reeeeeally want it, you can win (just like in life).

U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!