Photo: Ted Jones.


It has come to the Outpost’s attention, courtesy of this photo from Ted Jones, that Paul Bunyan and Babe the Blue Ox have adjusted their attire to match the era.

It makes sense. One time Paul Bunyan got so worked up telling a story that the droplets flew out from his mouth and drenched his listeners with 17 feet of precipitation. Paul never noticed — he went on and on yammering away for 30 days and nights, and that’s how we got Lake Erie.

One time Paul was singing some of his favorite lumberjacking songs at top voice while facing northeast, and the aerosols he expelled from his lower lungs floated for thousands of miles before settling in around the Grand Banks of Newfoundland, where they still hang to this day.

Paul talks a lot. The last thing he would want — Babe too — is to unwittingly spread virus to the many friends of theirs who come visit them at Trees of Mystery. Also, he’s following company policy.

“Our employees are wearing masks,” Trees of Mystery office manager Brenda Lopez told the Outpost this afternoon. “Paul is an employee.”

Lopez said that the masks have occasioned much merriment in the parking lot over the last few days. High school graduates have driven down to take selfies with Paul and Babe, to have as keepsakes of this odd, sometimes depressing era in which we live, and in which they have suddenly come of age.

Feeling blue? Come up and have a chat with Paul and see if he can’t talk you through this. Trees of Mystery is open from 9 a.m. to 5:30 p.m. every day. Trail entrance closes at 4 p.m.