(Chorus)
Ho, the County of Humboldt, where the redwoods meet the sea
We’re building up our airport, for travelers to be free
With the FAA grant in hand, we’ll relocate Taxiway A
To welcome in the planes that come from near and far away

(Verse 1)
On the fourteenth of July in the year 2026
The Board of Supervisors met to make their politics
Aviation had a plan, to accept the FAA’s grant
To fund the airport project, and make it just as grand

(Chorus)
Ho, the County of Humboldt, where the redwoods meet the sea
We’re building up our airport, for travelers to be free
With the FAA grant in hand, we’ll relocate Taxiway A
To welcome in the planes that come from near and far away

(Verse 2)
Granite Construction won the bid, the lowest price they gave
To relocate Taxiway A, and the lights to here behave
Lochner Inc. will oversee the project, see it through
With their help we’ll soon have an airport that is brand new

(Chorus)
Ho, the County of Humboldt, where the redwoods meet the sea
We’re building up our airport, for travelers to be free
With the FAA grant in hand, we’ll relocate Taxiway A
To welcome in the planes that come from near and far away

(Verse 3)
The funding sources have been found, to cover all the costs
Aviation funds and grants, to avoid any loss
The staff is ready to go, no impact on their roles
With this project completed, we’ll be reaching our goals

(Chorus)
Ho, the County of Humboldt, where the redwoods meet the sea
We’re building up our airport, for travelers to be free
With the FAA grant in hand, we’ll relocate Taxiway A
To welcome in the planes that come from near and far away

(Outro)
So here’s to Humboldt County, and the airport by the bay
May our skies be clear and open, as we go on our way
With the Resolution passed, and the money in our hands
We’ll build a better airport, for travelers in our lands.

— LoCOBot

Merv “The Beast” Tarkington: Good morning, patriots. This is Merv “The Beast” Tarkington coming to you live from the heart of America. Today, we have some breaking news out of Humboldt County that is sure to make your blood boil.

The Board of Supervisors in Humboldt County has approved a protocol for appointing members of the public to various boards, committees, and commissions. This may sound innocent enough on the surface, but make no mistake, folks, this is just another way for the radical left to infiltrate our local government and push their socialist agenda.

I’ve got my hands on the quarterly report of projected vacancies on these appointed boards, and let me tell you, it’s a who’s who of liberal activists and social justice warriors. These are the same people who want to defund our police, open our borders, and destroy our way of life. And now they want to be in charge of making decisions that affect our communities? Not on my watch.

But it doesn’t stop there, folks. The Clerk of the Board’s Office is accepting applications year-round for these positions. That’s right, they’re just inviting anyone and everyone to come in and take over our local government. And where is the funding for all of this coming from? You guessed it, the General Fund. Your hard-earned taxpayer dollars are being used to fund this liberal takeover.

But fear not, patriots. We will not stand idly by and let this happen. We need to rise up, speak out, and fight back against this blatant attempt to undermine our democracy. Contact the Board of Supervisors in Humboldt County and let them know that we will not be silenced. We will not be pushed aside. We are the silent majority, and we will not be ignored.

Stay tuned for more updates on this developing story. And remember, freedom isn’t free. It’s up to us to defend it. This is Merv “The Beast” Tarkington, signing off. God bless America.

— LoCOBot

(Scene: A small meeting room in the County of Humboldt government building. The room is filled with the Board of Supervisors, each member reviewing the Quarterly Report of Current Projected Vacancies on Humboldt County Board of Supervisors Appointed Boards, Committees, and Commissions. The Clerk of the Board stands at the front of the room, addressing the board.)

Clerk of the Board: Thank you for taking the time to review the quarterly report on our current and projected vacancies on the various boards, committees, and commissions within Humboldt County. As you can see from the attached list (pointing to the document), we have a variety of positions that are in need of appointments in the coming months.

Supervisor 1: (scrutinizing the list) It seems like we have quite a few vacancies coming up. Have we received any applications for these positions?

Clerk of the Board: Yes, we have received a few applications for some of the vacancies, but there are still many positions that remain unfilled. We encourage anyone interested in serving on a board or committee to submit their application as soon as possible.

Supervisor 2: (nodding) It’s crucial that we have active participation from members of the community on these boards. They play a vital role in shaping the policies and decisions that affect our county.

Supervisor 3: (leaning forward) Is there any specific criteria or qualifications required for these positions?

Clerk of the Board: Each board, committee, or commission may have its own set of qualifications or requirements, but generally, we are looking for individuals who are committed to serving their community and willing to dedicate their time and expertise to the position.

Supervisor 4: (raising a hand) I move to receive and file the report. Do I have a second?

Supervisor 5: Second.

Chairman: All those in favor of receiving and filing the report?

(All board members raise their hands in agreement)

Chairman: The motion carries. Thank you, Clerk of the Board, for your presentation. Let’s make sure we work diligently to fill these vacancies and continue to engage with our community members in the decision-making process.

— LoCOBot

In the County of Humboldt, on a sunny July day,
The Board of Supervisors met, to discuss and to say,
About vacancies on boards, committees, and more,
For the community to join and explore.

Recommendations were made, to receive and to file,
The Clerk of the Board with a helpful smile,
Presented a report, with details so fine,
On all current and projected vacancies in line.

Applications are accepted year-round, you see,
For those who want to serve, and to be free,
To make a difference, in their community,
By joining a board or committee.

No financial impact, just a report to review,
Supporting the Strategic Plan for what’s best to do,
So let’s all come together, and lend a hand,
For the County of Humboldt, a beautiful land.

So here’s to the meeting, on 7/14/2026,
Where decisions were made, for the County to fix,
Let’s all work together, for a better day,
In the County of Humboldt, where we all play.

— LoCOBot