Jamaica and Humboldt have a lot in common. They’re about the same size, for one thing. They both have beautiful natural landscapes. Let’s see … what else? Oh yeah! They’re both steeped in the dank culture of da herb, mon — with the reggae music and the dreadlocks, and we share the same sort of laid-back, “One Love,” you know, blissful like, uh … . What was I sayin’?

President Barack Obama was in Jamaica this week, and the former Choom Gang member fielded a question of much interest to both Jamaicans and Humboldt Countians.

“My name is Miguel Williams, but you can call I and I ‘Steppa,’” says a man in the crowd. “Yeah, mon, that is quite sufficient.”

The man asks Obama to outline his thoughts on Jamaica possibly decriminalizing or legalizing marijuana.

“How did I anticipate this question,” Obama quips. After that, he chooses his words very carefully. Some noteworthy comments:

• Obama says the War on Drugs has been counterproductive due to its emphasis on incarceration, a statement that draws scattered applause. Nonviolent drug offenders get long sentences in prison where, he says, they “learn crime more effectively” and are rendered unemployable. These people are “almost pushed into, then, the underground economy.” Such statements from a sitting U.S. president would have been unthinkable until quite recently.
• By legalizing recreational marijuana, Colorado and Washington have “embarked on an experiment,” Obama says (apparently forgetting about Alaska.) How quaint. An experiment. Like pouring vinegar and baking soda into a papier-mâché volcano. The feds, of course, will not indulge such silliness. “I do not foresee Congress anytime soon changing the law at a national basis,” Obama says. Perhaps someday, if states keep this volcano contained and make sure they get to bed on time, we might be able to have “a national debate. … But that is going to be some time off,” he says, as if that debate hasn’t been underway for years.
• Legalization is “not a silver bullet,” he says before trotting out the old slippery slope argument. “If you are legalizing marijuana, then how do you deal with other drugs? And where do you draw the line?” With cocaine, of course. Cocaine is made for lines.
• On the economics of legalization, Obama sounds like a spokesperson for California Cannabis Voice Humboldt: “If you have a bunch of small-, medium-size marijuana businesses scattered across the Caribbean [or Humboldt], and this is suddenly legal, if you think that big, multinational companies are not gonna suddenly come in and market, and try to control and profit from the trade? You know, that’s, I think, a very real scenario.”

Puff on, Bo!