Hey, any contribution to the sum of human understanding of how the universe works is a net positive, right?

… 

Eh, maybe not. Anyway, LoCO readers will remember an incident last week in which a Eureka resident was arrested following a shooting near the PALCO Marsh area. Of course, the detail that likely made it stand out in your brain was the peculiar ammunition used: “a flare gun loaded with a shotgun shell filled with Rice Krispies,” according to a subsequent Eureka Police Department press release. 

Why? We may never know. 

 

But the Internet has an uncanny way of spreading dumb information far and wide. In this instance, Eureka’s odd occurrence piqued the curiosity of YouTube user and shooting-things enthusiast TAOFLEDERMAUS who just had to know: What happens if you shoot someone with breakfast cereal (and how many views can that get)?

Thus, in the name of kinda science, the TAOFLEDERMAUS team found the nearest corn field and subjected a watermelon, a lump of clay and a mustachioed dummy, among other shootable things, to some close-range Fruity Pebbles and Grape Nuts blasts. Witness their experimentin’ below.

How effective are breakfast cereals for inflicting damage on your buddies? TAOFLEDERMAUS give their conclusion in the clip: “They suck.”

“The cereal really did nothing, but the plastic wadding can be quite dangerous, even at these LOW velocities,” they write in the clip’s description on YouTube. 

See? Now there’s one more thing you’ll never again have to wonder about. Win.