There once was a DA candidate, Eads
Her slogan really should be ‘Eads Leads’
She’s smart, hard working too
Bad guys will receive what’s due
Stacey Eads will accomplish good deeds

— Jean Sheffler


In the County Recorder’s Office serves Tiffany
Her dedication has earned her a vote from you and me
Her always positive attitude
Is always met with gratitude
Come on, Humboldt, let’s join in an epiphany

— Mike O’Hern


Report of A-C investigation
KPD claims it’s only fiction
Employees squeal
The pain is real
 Vote Cheryl, start A-C’s eviction

The County can use some consoling
New Master of Audit-Controlling
Who makes it fun
Gets reports done
Vote Dillingham, get payroll rolling

— Katrin Homan


The environment, turns out it matters!
When it’s tough, politicians, they scatter!
but Arroyo’s Bad A$$.
Ceilings, she shatters,
What? A politician who accounts for the cash!?

Natalie’s running for 4th district, oh good!
She’s got sense in her head, respect for Red Wood,
mad diplomacy skill!
So sick of the sh&t in this hood?
So vote for Arroyo on June 7th: I will!

— Dana Maher


Steve thinks Klamath should lose its big dam in
This river which can’t stand more slammin’
Our creeks he restores
Clam beach he adores
He’s for salmon and clammin’ not scammin’!

From Mac’ville to Klamath to Orleans
Steven’s efforts rate high by all means
Helping Fire Volunteers
Tribes, Districts and peers
He helps them achieve all their dreams.

— Harriet Hill

Madrone has been residing
In the District he’s now guiding
For forty five years
Let’s give him five cheers
Keep him over the Fifth presiding

There is a man from Eureka
He moved to the Fifth to seek a
Prominent role
To be in control
We’d rather he went to Topeka

— Diane Higgins

Madrone is a candidate most Delectable
He treats everyone as Respectable
He works not for favors
It’s the challenges he savors
Which makes him supremely Electable

A brave fellow is Stephen Madrone
In a world that’s so self-destruct-prone
He has great foresight
At times to do right
He must to be counted alone

Madrone is a man who won’t muck it
With more than panache in his bucket
He won’t go for smears
To get four more years
But from others he may have to duck it

With Madrone you get a straight arrow
A mind that is kind and not narrow
He studies the issues
Our funds he won’t misuse
He votes based on reason and care-oh (oy)

— Joyce King

The Dossiad

There once was a knight with a Clydesdale
Who learned that his kingdom may soon fail
On seventh night
He won the fight
Hurray to the Larry Doss Prevail

Elect Larry Doss to the fifth throne
In June tell the incumbent: Go Home!
Who thinks he knows better
And true facts don’t matter
Vote Yes Larry Doss, No Madrone

Madrone and Doss went for a ride
Through Humboldt’s serene countryside
Larry rode farther
Steve ran out of water
Vote Larry Doss on polling night!

The Sups gave the sheriffs a raise
Madrone now seeks everyone’s praise
You know what’s wild?
The Sheriff smiled
In Doss nomination portraits

Madrone agitated Michelle
While discussing banking the rail
“It benefits all
Should meth sales fall
Through South Humboldt let’s blast a trail!”

To Geologist, state-certified,
“I know so much more” Steve replied
“I read a book
Took googling look
Your expert review is denied!”

Madrone share’s same camp with A-C
KPD is Steve’s nominee
Just days earlier
He censured her
Vote Larry Doss save our County!

With their water tanks empty and dry
At Madrone his constituents cry
Steve smiles, “That’s real good
Keeps exclusive your hood“
Vote for Larry Doss, give him a try!

Madrone wants for tourists a center
Where thieves will go for legal tender
While views distract
Rides are ransacked
Vote Larry Doss, don’t just surrender!

On Sups’ sheets his comments Steve provides
Ancient rumors as facts he recites
Now process gets hampered
With science that’s tampered
Vote Larry Doss, he’ll supervise!

Are you worried about housing loss
Tired of criminals who steal and harass?
If you’re on the fence
Don’t take a chance
Team up for Humboldt, vote Larry Doss!

— Katrin Homan


The editor crew is a mean one
Wants limericks! Letters they condone
Faithful reader
Praise your leader
Then tore the creations and stomped on :-(

— Katrin Homan

In composing a limerick, per Sims
Some writers are shameful and dim
He says it’s astonishing
But goes on admonishing
Those he thinks lesser than him

So sad we are not smart like Hank
Suggesting our limericks are rank
He says some are terrible
But that’s not unbearable
Would he rather our pages be blank?

— Lora Canzoneri

Since limericks are mandatory
I think they told the story
But some can’t write
and have to alight
On different perambulatory

Election letters are dour
You couldn’t get anymore sour
To make ‘em fun
Just add a pun
Or a limerick to scour

— Bob Felter


OK, that’s enough limericks for now! See you again in the fall, maybe, and I beg you to spend time working on your chops in the offseason.