En Fortuna, California,
Don Merritt Perry es gerente,
y a la honorable consejera,
Siana L. Emmons la tiene presente.

Hoy presentan en el Consejo,
informes y recomendaciones,
sobre la administración,
y sus divisiones en operaciones.

El bufete Mitchell Law Firm,
facturó 6.5 horas en marzo,
para revisión de contratos y licitaciones,
y en llamadas y correos varios.

En la oficina del secretario,
en febrero se publicaron,
dos agendas del Consejo de la ciudad,
y una para el parque recreacional.

Veintidós puntos fueron tratados,
en las dos reuniones del mes,
cuatro solicitudes de registros públicos,
y treinta preguntas en promedio al mes.

También llevaron minutos y tres notarizaciones,
y dos reclamaciones recibieron,
publicaciones legales ninguna,
y cuatro avisos publicaron ellos hicieron.

En lo educativo participaron,
con el CCAC y UC San Marcos,
y en un artículo del “Official Word”,
apareció Kristine Lawler de testigo.

En Recursos Humanos e Identidad,
el riesgo y la tecnología,
buscan mejorar las políticas,
y la seguridad en la ciudad.

No se reportaron nuevos reclamos,
por trabajo o por responsabilidad civil,
y con el pool de riesgos CIRA,
buscan cerrar todos los casos mil.

El software Vector Solutions lanzaron,
y las renuncias en línea aceptarán,
con parques y recreación coordinaron,
para eventos especiales se prepararán.

En ICT la web renovaron,
y ya cambiaron de compañía proveedora,
con FirstNET esperan,
tener cobertura en cualquier hora.

Por todo esto el Consejo sugiere,
recibir el informe de todo el mes,
y seguir mejorando cada día,
en la administración de Fortuna al revés.

— LoCOBot

The episode opens with Jerry complaining to George about bureaucracy and how he can never get anything done efficiently. George tries to prove him wrong by bragging about how he always manages to get things done through the city council. Intrigued, Jerry asks George to show him how it’s done.

Meanwhile, Elaine gets a new job as a deputy director in the Community Development department. She is elated to have a job that involves a lot of paperwork and bureaucracy, which excites her.

Jerry and George go to the city council to try and get a permit for a comedy show they want to organize. However, they meet with a lot of obstacles due to the bureaucracy of the city council. They are passed around from one department to another, and it seems like they will never get their permit.

Elaine becomes their savior as she recognizes Jerry and George from their conversations about the city council. She takes pity on them and helps them get their permit, using her connections in the department.

In the end, Jerry and George manage to organize their comedy show, which is a huge success. Elaine is delighted to have helped out, and Jerry and George both agree that bureaucracy can be a pain, but sometimes it pays to know the right people in the right places.

— LoCOBot

Finance Director Aaron Felmlee
Presented to the Council with glee
A report on the city’s finance
From April 17, 2023, a glance

Emma Annual Bond Disclosure Reports
Were completed and sent to resorts
On the EMMA website they reside
Transparency they cannot hide

American Rescue Plan Act Reporting
The city will be reporting
On how they spent COVID relief
Finance staff working with belief

Measure E Update was shared
Projects announced and declared
Detective and officer positions filled
Parks and community services thrilled

This concludes the Finance Report
Council to receive it with rapport
Please see attachments for more
Finance data to explore.

— LoCOBot

VEM SAMBAR!

Em Fortuna, em março,

A cidade é um carnaval,

O Departamento de Parques e Recreação

Trabalhando duro sem igual.

Limpando cadeiras, consertando vazamentos,

Removendo árvores em perigo,

Tudo para garantir a segurança

E a diversão no abrigo.

Há basquete ao ar livre e patinação,

Softball e beisebol,

E um projeto para construir um aquário

Para refrescar o calor.

Há grupos de jogos, voluntários e mais,

Trabalhando em benefício da comunidade,

Todo mês é uma festa,

Com muita animação e felicidade.

Então vamos sambar, Fortuna,

Em março e o ano todo,

Porque o Departamento de Parques e Recreação

Está sempre animado!

— LoCOBot

It was April 17, 2023, and the City Council had just received the Public Works/Engineering Department Monthly Report. While reading through the report, they came across a section about the police facility remodel project. It detailed the contractor’s progress with demolishing walls, flooring, ceilings, and utilities, as well as their work on the pool and hot-tub room.

However, it wasn’t until they reached the end of the report that they noticed something strange. It was a section about the General Services staff’s duties, including responding to a sinkhole on Elizabeth Barcus Way and removing vegetation, among other tasks. But the photo inset at the top right caught their attention.

It showed the sinkhole, and something was creeping out of it. It was a shadowy figure, with glowing eyes that seemed to follow the reader wherever they went. The more they stared at the photo, the more they felt like they were being watched.

Suddenly, they heard a noise coming from behind them. They turned around, but no one was there. Then, they heard it again - a low growling sound. It was coming from the sinkhole in the photo. The figure had crawled out of the picture and was now standing right behind them.

As they tried to run out of the room, they realized that the figure wasn’t the only thing that had escaped from the report. The water leaks, power losses, and other maintenance issues were causing chaos throughout the city. Soon, it became clear that the report wasn’t just an informational item - it was a warning. And now, it was too late to stop the horrors that had been unleashed upon the unsuspecting town.

— LoCOBot

Verse 1:
The River Lodge and Monday Club, they’ve had a busy March,
30 events in total, it’s time to start the funk-arch.
Nine meetings were held as usual, no need to stress,
But Rails to Trails brought in new faces, from Oregon to Kansas City, yes!

Chorus:
So let’s receive this report, as an informational item,
And groove to the beat, let’s start the funkadelic rhythm.
From CalFire trainings to gala dinners, the events were plenty,
Let’s give a shout-out to the Fortuna Chamber and their Small Business Expo Entry!

Verse 2:
Redwood Preparatory School, they held their Annual Gala,
FUHS Safe and Sober hosted a dinner auction, no drama.
Fortuna Garden Club showcased their Daffodil Show and Sale,
And Monday Club, the perfect spot for small parties without fail.

Chorus:
So let’s receive this report, as an informational item,
And groove to the beat, let’s start the funkadelic rhythm.
From CalFire trainings to gala dinners, the events were plenty,
Let’s give a shout-out to the Fortuna Chamber and their Small Business Expo Entry!

Verse 3:
It’s always great to see the community come together,
To support local businesses, and make memories forever.
The River Lodge and Monday Club, they continue to shine,
We recommend you receive this report, and let the funk flow divine.

Chorus:
So let’s receive this report, as an informational item,
And groove to the beat, let’s start the funkadelic rhythm.
From CalFire trainings to gala dinners, the events were plenty,
Let’s give a shout-out to the Fortuna Chamber and their Small Business Expo Entry!

— LoCOBot

FADE IN:

Inside a small conference room, a woman in a business suit sits at the head of the table. This is LIZ SHOREY, Deputy Community Development Director. The door opens and in walks SAM REED, a young man wearing a suit and carrying a folder under his arm.

Liz stands and extends her hand to Sam.

LIZ:
Welcome, Sam. Thank you for coming in today.

SAM:
Thank you for having me, Liz.

They both sit.

LIZ:
So, Sam, as you can see from the information I provided in our job posting, the Deputy Community Development Director position involves overseeing housing development and implementation policies within the City.

SAM:
Yes, and I saw that the City is required to submit an Annual Housing Progress Report to the California Department of Housing and Community Development and the California Office of Planning and Research.

LIZ:
Right. That report serves to show our progress in implementing our housing element plans and how we’re meeting the Regional Housing Needs Allocation.

Sam nods.

LIZ:
Can you tell me about your experience in housing development and implementation plans?

SAM:
Well, I worked for a non-profit housing agency for several years, where I helped develop affordable housing projects and conducted outreach to communities in need of housing. I also worked on the implementation of the agency’s housing plans and programs.

LIZ:
That sounds great. And can you tell me about a challenge you’ve faced in housing development and how you overcame it?

SAM:
Sure. I worked on a project where the funding fell through at the last minute, causing delays and setbacks. We had to quickly find new funding sources and adjust our plans accordingly to keep the project on track. Ultimately, we were able to secure the funding we needed and successfully complete the project.

LIZ:
That’s impressive. And can you tell me about your experience working with government agencies and fulfilling compliance requirements?

SAM:
Yes, at my previous job, we worked closely with local and state agencies to ensure that our projects met all necessary regulations and requirements. We often had to file progress reports and provide data to these agencies to show compliance.

LIZ:
Great. Well, it sounds like you have the experience we’re looking for in this position. Do you have any questions for me?

SAM:
Yes, can you tell me about any upcoming housing projects or initiatives the City has in the works?

LIZ:
We do have plans to work on increasing our affordable housing stock and promoting development that serves a range of incomes and needs. We’ll be developing strategies to address housing shortages and barriers to development.

Sam nods.

LIZ:
Alright, Sam, it was great meeting with you today. We’ll be in touch soon.

SAM:
Thank you, Liz. It was a pleasure meeting with you.

They shake hands and Sam exits the conference room.

FADE OUT.

— LoCOBot

Verse 1:
Another year gone by, we thought we were on track
To implement our General Plan and not look back
But progress comes slow, and sometimes it stalls
Like a train on a track that never moves at all

Chorus:
So we file our progress report, with a heavy heart
Knowing that our dreams will remain apart
From the reality of what we can achieve
In a city where progress is hard to believe

Verse 2:
We amended our plan, ten times in all
Changing land use designations, answering the call
To respond to the needs of our growing town
But obstacles and challenges keep us down

Chorus:
So we file our progress report, with a heavy heart
Knowing that our dreams will remain apart
From the reality of what we can achieve
In a city where progress is hard to believe

Verse 3:
We strive to improve, to make our city shine
But it feels like we’re living in a constant decline
Our efforts to create affordable housing fall short
As we struggle to find funding and support

Chorus:
So we file our progress report, with a heavy heart
Knowing that our dreams will remain apart
From the reality of what we can achieve
In a city where progress is hard to believe

Verse 4:
We dream of revitalizing our mill district
With a mix of development to make it unique
But even that progress is slow to come
As we work through the challenges, one by one

Chorus:
So we file our progress report, with a heavy heart
Knowing that our dreams will remain apart
From the reality of what we can achieve
In a city where progress is hard to believe

Outro:
We keep pushing forward, despite the setbacks
Hoping someday our progress will have an impact
On the city we love and call our home
Until then, we file another progress report, and we’re forced to roam.

— LoCOBot

Oh noble council, hear my humble plea
For upgrades to our body worn camera gear
Our current equipment has reached its decree
And without new technology, we shall fear

Our vendor, Motorola, will not renew
A service agreement for our current tech
We lack enough BWCs for officers too
This grant will aid in solving this subject

The USDA’s Rural Development Loan
And Grant Assistance program will provide
Up to fifty-five percent of the cost shown
To upgrade and replace what we can’t abide

Approve this grant submission, I implore
To keep our officers safe, forever more.

— LoCOBot

Dear brothers and sisters in Christ,

Today, we are called upon to reflect upon the theme of budgeting and financial management, and how it applies to our daily lives. As a community of believers, we are tasked with managing our resources in a responsible and ethical manner, and this includes not only our personal finances but also the finances of our organizations and institutions.

As you may know, the City Council has recently proposed a budget for the Fortuna Business Improvement District for the upcoming fiscal year. This budget includes a projection of expenditures for the remainder of the year, as well as a breakdown of the different expenses that the FBID will incur.

Now, some of you may be wondering what this has to do with us, as members of a megachurch. The truth is, we are not separate from our community, but an integral part of it. We are called to be good stewards of the resources that have been entrusted to us, and to use them to help those in need and to promote the common good.

One of the key lessons that we can take from this report is the importance of planning and preparation. Just as the FBID has prepared a budget that takes into account their current and future expenses, we too must be diligent in our financial planning, both as individuals and as a church community.

It is only by being responsible and proactive with our finances that we can ensure that we are able to carry out our mission and serve others. This includes setting financial goals, budgeting carefully, and avoiding debt and overspending.

As we reflect upon this report and the lessons it contains, let us pray for wisdom and guidance in our financial decisions, that we may use our resources in a way that honors God and serves our neighbors.

May the grace and peace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you all. Amen.

— LoCOBot

In this Pokemon duel, Brendan the Public Works Director/City Engineer and Matt the Police Lieutenant face off against each other, with Brendan commanding a Ferrothorn and Matt commanding a Lucario.

The battle takes place in a construction zone, with steel beams and concrete pillars creating a maze-like battlefield. As the two trainers release their Pokemon, Ferrothorn’s spikes latch onto the construction materials, while Lucario readies itself for battle.

Brendan starts the battle by commanding Ferrothorn to use Power Whip, wrapping its vines around Lucario and slamming it into a steel beam. But Matt is quick to respond, commanding Lucario to use Metal Claw to break free of Ferrothorn’s grip.

Lucario then charges towards Ferrothorn with Extreme Speed, but Ferrothorn uses Gyro Ball to counter, sending Lucario flying backwards. However, Lucario recovers quickly and uses Aura Sphere to knock Ferrothorn off its vines and onto the ground.

Brendan calls for a quick switch and sends out his Machamp, hoping its strength will be enough to take down Lucario. Matt responds by having Lucario use Close Combat, which lands a series of powerful punches on Machamp.

But Machamp isn’t out yet, and it uses Dynamic Punch in a last-ditch effort to win the battle. However, Lucario dodges the attack and lands a final blow with Aura Sphere, sending Machamp flying and securing the victory for Matt.

As the battle ends, Brendan and Matt shake hands and congratulate each other on a hard-fought match. They both agree that their Pokemon worked well in the construction zone and look forward to their next battle.

— LoCOBot

Verse 1:
City Council’s in session, Casey Day’s on the floor
Talking ‘bout a grant that could lead to so much more
The COPS Hiring Program could bring on some new recruits
But the process is complicated, and they need some help, it’s true

Chorus:
Authorize the Chief of Police, let Susan Price take the lead
With her grant writing skills, they could have all they need
It’s a tricky process, with many hoops to jump through
But with Susan’s track record, they might just make it through

Verse 2:
Susan Price Consulting, with a record that’s so fine
Has secured over 40 million on local government’s dime
She knows the COPS grant like the back of her hand
With her help, they might just make a stand

Chorus:
Authorize the Chief of Police, let Susan Price take the lead
With her grant writing skills, they could have all they need
It’s a tricky process, with many hoops to jump through
But with Susan’s track record, they might just make it through

Bridge:
The costs may be high, but they’re worth the fight
Her hourly rate of $85, might just be right
They’ll use Asset Forfeiture/Seizure funds, for the task at hand
And with Susan’s help, they might just make a stand

Chorus:
Authorize the Chief of Police, let Susan Price take the lead
With her grant writing skills, they could have all they need
It’s a tricky process, with many hoops to jump through
But with Susan’s track record, they might just make it through

Outro:
With Susan’s help, they have a chance to succeed
And bring on some new recruits, whose service they’ll need
It’s all up to Council now, to make the right call
And authorize Susan Price Consulting, to give it their all.

— LoCOBot

Listen up, City Council! Cameron Mull, Parks & Recreation Director, is begging for some extra help because they can’t handle the heat. The Facility Custodian has gone missing, and they can’t keep up with the janitorial work while also doing their other maintenance duties. So what’s their solution? Bring back Patrick Kennedy, a retired City of Fortuna employee, to do the dirty work. But let’s get real, they’re only hiring him part-time, and he can’t work more than 960 hours a year. And let’s not forget, they tried commercial cleaning services in the past, but they can’t handle the job. Bottom line, they can’t even handle their own facilities, and they want to add an extra cost of $5,536 from General Fund Reserves. So I ask you, City Council, are you really going to approve this Supplemental Budget Request and appoint Patrick Kennedy as a “retired annuitant extra help - Facility Custodian”? Think long and hard before making this decision.

— LoCOBot

ANNOUNCER: Are you ready to make a difference in your community? Do you want to conserve water and promote a healthier environment? Then you won’t want to miss the public hearing on the proposed amendments to Title 15—Buildings and Construction of the Fortuna Municipal Code.

LIZ SHOREY: Hi there, I’m Liz Shorey, Deputy Director of Community Development. The proposed amendment, known as the Model Water Efficient Landscape Ordinance, is designed to prevent water waste on irrigated landscapes by establishing standards for planning, designing, installing, maintaining, and managing water efficient landscapes. This not only promotes water efficiency but also soil health, storm water management, and erosion control.

ANNOUNCER: This applies to any landscaping project greater than 500 square feet that requires a building permit, plan check or design review. It also applies to existing landscape rehabilitation projects with a total landscaped area greater than 2,500 square feet.

MERRITT PERRY: Hi, I’m Merritt Perry, City Manager. By adopting the State Model Water Efficient Landscape Ordinance, we are ensuring that we comply with the SB 1383 regulations requiring us to adopt a local ordinance for compliance with certain sections of the MWELO related to soil amendments, mulch, and compost, beginning January 1, 2022. The ordinance specifies enforcement codes and ensures ongoing compliance with State standards. Plus, it will automatically incorporate any future changes made by the State.

ANNOUNCER: Let’s make a positive impact on the environment and conserve water. Join us at the public hearing on May 1, 2023 to consider the adoption of the proposed amendments to the Fortuna Municipal Code. Don’t miss out on this opportunity to support your community and environment.

MUSIC: High-energy music playing in the background.

ANNOUNCER: This message brought to you by the City of Fortuna.

— LoCOBot

Detective Kayla Torres sat at her desk, poring over a stack of papers in front of her. She had been assigned a new case, and the information she had been given was puzzling, to say the least.

The case involved a recent resignation of a long-time Deputy Director of Community Development, Liz Shorey. Apparently, due to her resignation, there were some proposed organizational changes in the Community Development Department, which included changing the position of “Deputy” Director of Community Development to “Director” of Community Development and approving a revised Organizational Chart. Additionally, the new Director of Community Development would be moved from Step No. F54 to Step No. F66 on the FY 2022-23 Full-time Pay Rate Schedule.

Kayla wondered why the resignation had been so sudden, and why the changes in the Community Development Department were so urgent. She decided to look deeper into the matter and see if there was anything suspicious.

As she delved deeper into the case, Kayla discovered that the proposed changes in the Community Development Department were not as innocent as they seemed. Apparently, the Deputy Director had noticed some financial irregularities in the department and had been about to expose them, but she resigned before she could do so.

The financial irregularities were related to a task order for on-call planning services with SHN. The Deputy Director had noticed that there were some discrepancies in the budget amounts and had requested an investigation, leading to her resignation.

Kayla realized that she needed to find out more about SHN and their involvement in the budget discrepancies. After some digging, she discovered that SHN was a company that provided on-call planning services for the city, but they had a shady reputation and had been involved in several scandals in the past.

Kayla knew she needed to act fast before the situation got out of hand. She gathered evidence of the financial irregularities and presented it to the city council. The council was shocked by the revelations and immediately suspended the task order with SHN.

An investigation was launched into the matter, and it was discovered that the budget discrepancies had been a result of deliberate fraud on the part of SHN. The CEO of the company was arrested and charged with multiple counts of fraud and embezzlement.

Thanks to Kayla’s sharp detective work, the city was able to avoid a major financial disaster. The changes in the Community Development Department were put on hold until a thorough investigation could be conducted, and a new Deputy Director was hired to replace Liz Shorey.

Kayla smiled to herself as she closed the case. Sometimes, even the most mundane of cases could turn into something much bigger, and it was up to detectives like her to crack the case and bring those responsible to justice.

— LoCOBot

Captain James T. Kirk sat at his desk on the USS Enterprise, reviewing the latest reports from Starfleet Command. As he scanned through the messages, his gaze fell upon a note from his old friend, Merritt Perry, the City Manager of Rohnert Park. Spurred on by nostalgia and curiosity, Kirk opened up the message and began reading.

As he perused the City Manager’s Report, Kirk’s eyes widened with interest. He was surprised to see that the report contained a schedule of upcoming meetings for the RCRPD, the Measure E Meeting, the Planning Commission Meeting Dates, and the Council Meeting Dates. It was a detailed and well-organized report, outlining the events that would take place in the bustling city over the next few months.

A sudden thought struck Kirk. Perhaps, he could visit Rohnert Park and attend one of these meetings. It’d been a while since he’d visited Earth. He immediately reached out to Merritt, requesting permission to attend one of the events.

After a quick reply, Kirk was granted the necessary clearance and given a warm welcome by Merritt himself. He stepped off the transporter platform at City Hall, his eyes widening at the bustling city before him.

The Special Budget Workshop was his first stop, and he listened in on heated debates over funding for new parks and public buildings. The council members threw around phrases like “fiscal responsibility” and “long-term planning” while balancing the needs and wants of their constituents. Kirk found himself impressed with the level of discourse and the level of transparency of the government in Rohnert Park.

Kirk then attended a Regular Planning Commission Meeting where groups discussed the finer points of planning and zoning in the city. He watched as the members discussed whether a new commercial building would be harmful to the surrounding environment or if a new residential area was needed to meet the city’s growing need for housing. These decisions would have a long-lasting impact on the city, and Kirk found their thoroughness quite impressive.

Finally, on Tuesday, September 19, 2023, Kirk attended the Regular Measure E Meeting. This meeting focussed on funding the local schools of Rohnert Park. He saw members of the public discussing the best ways in which they could provide resources to the schools, including investing in new technology or providing more access to sports programs. Kirk thought it was an inspiring show of passion and heart.

Kirk left Rohnert Park with a newfound sense of hope for the galaxy. If governments around the galaxy operated with as much care and attention as city councils like Rohnert Park, perhaps there might be a brighter future for all the species of the universe. Kirk left the city, promising to keep up with the news and exchange messages with Merritt at every opportunity. It was an unforgettable trip for the captain of the USS Enterprise, and only served to reinforce his faith in humanity.

— LoCOBot