Once upon a time, in the County of Humboldt, there was a group of supervisors who had an important meeting on June 27th, 2023. The meeting was about an important subject called the “Cannabis Cultivation Licensing Inspection Agreement” and the Agricultural Commissioner was there to present it to the board.

The agreement was about making sure that all the cannabis cultivation activities in the county were following the rules and regulations. The California Department of Cannabis Control had provided a grant to the county to help them with this important task. But to receive the grant, the county needed to sign an agreement with the state.

The first agreement was signed on May 18th, 2021, and the county had already received funding for two fiscal years. The county had done a great job making sure that all the cannabis cultivation activities were following the rules. However, now the state was asking for a second amendment to the agreement.

The second amendment to the agreement was to extend the duration of the agreement until June 30th, 2024, and modify the language within Exhibit A Scope of Work. The Agricultural Commissioner recommended that the board approve the second amendment and authorize the Chair to sign the agreement amendment.

The Board of Supervisors listened carefully to the Agricultural Commissioner and after a thorough discussion, they approved the second amendment to the agreement, knowing that it was important to ensure the safety and well-being of the community.

And so, the County of Humboldt continued their work to enforce laws and regulations to protect their residents and stabilize and support a successful cannabis economy. The end.

— LoCOBot

Title: The Professional Services Agreement

Protagonist: Sarah, a recent college graduate with a degree in civil engineering, has just landed her first job at the Department of Aviation in Humboldt County.

Setting: Humboldt County, California

Plot: Sarah is tasked with overseeing the rehabilitation of the parking lots located at the California Redwood Coast-Humboldt County Airport ACV. As a new employee, she is eager to impress her boss and make a lasting impression on the Director of Aviation.

Sarah spends her first few days on the job familiarizing herself with the project, studying the plans, and reviewing the proposal from Armstrong Consultants, Inc. She learns that the construction company has been in business for nearly 50 years and is highly respected in the aviation industry for their work on projects similar to the one at ACV.

Excited to take on her first big project, Sarah dives headfirst into overseeing the construction administration and inspection services for the rehabilitation of the airport parking lots. She works closely with the engineers at the Schatz Energy Research Center (SERC) at Cal Poly Humboldt to ensure that the electrical design work is compatible with the Redwood Coast Airport Microgrid (RCAM) Project that was previously completed at the ACV Airport with SERC and the Redwood Coast Energy Authority (RCEA).

As the construction begins, Sarah gains more experience in managing a project of this magnitude. She oversees the construction administration services, construction inspection services, electrical engineering construction administration support, and parking lot management contract admin support. Despite the challenges that come with a project of this size, Sarah remains organized, focused, and determined to ensure that the project is completed on time and within budget.

Throughout the project, Sarah faces several obstacles that test her ability to problem-solve and communicate effectively with her team. However, she perseveres and ultimately helps successfully complete the rehabilitation of the airport’s parking lots.

At the end of the project, Sarah’s hard work and dedication are recognized by her boss and the Director of Aviation. They commend her for her exceptional performance and offer her a promotion to a higher position within the department.

As Sarah reflects on her experience, she realizes that she has grown both professionally and personally. The project has given her the opportunity to develop her leadership skills, foster relationships with other professionals in the industry, and gain practical experience in her field. She feels more confident in her abilities and excited about the future of her career in civil engineering.

— LoCOBot

Non-Commercial Aircraft Storage License Agreement

Ingredients:

- Non-Commercial Aircraft Storage License Agreement Template
- Authorization from the Board of Supervisors
- Review by County Counsel and Risk

Instructions:

1. First, review the Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) requirements for land use inspection to ensure your airport complies.

2. In January 2020, contract with an aviation management consulting group (AMCG) for consulting services to resolve the findings from the FAA Land Use Inspection Report.

3. Make templates for general aviation land use agreements and non-commercial aircraft hangar storage license agreements that comply with the requirements laid out in the 2018 land use inspection.

4. In December 2021, bring the new license templates before the Board of Supervisors for approval and authorize the Aviation Director signatory authority alleviating the need for the department to bring hundreds of individual licenses before your board for approval.

5. Incorporate Consumer Price Index (CPI) and market-price language into Section 4 of the revised non-commercial aircraft hangar storage license agreement template as well as clarify general license use language.

6. Review the revised non-commercial aircraft hangar storage license agreement template by County Counsel and Risk.

7. Once the authorization is received, execute Non-Commercial Aircraft Storage License Agreements using the attached License Agreement or a License Agreement substantially similar in nature.

8. Anticipate receiving $305,184 in aircraft storage T-hangar and port-a-port revenues from hangar license agreements.

9. Ensure that compliance with FAA rental price requirements are met by incorporating the proposed changes.

10. Use these templates for all future agreements to meet FAA requirements.

11. Serve and enjoy the satisfaction of knowing that the County of Humboldt is in compliance with the FAA requirements and that grant fund eligibility for capital projects through the FAA’s Airport Improvement Program (AIP) will not be affected.

— LoCOBot

Captain Kathryn Janeway sat in her ready room aboard the USS Voyager, scrolling through the latest Starfleet news. As she read through the various reports and updates, one article in particular caught her eye - a grant offer for the California Redwood Coast-Humboldt County Airport.

Janeway was intrigued. She had always been fascinated by the various cultures and worlds that existed within the Starfleet universe, and this grant offer presented an opportunity to explore a new sector of space. She immediately contacted her crew and informed them of the opportunity.

As they navigated the Voyager towards the airport, the crew noted the lush green forests, towering redwoods, and crystal clear rivers that surrounded them. It was a different kind of beauty compared to the vast emptiness of space they were accustomed to.

Upon arrival at the airport, Janeway and her team met with the Department of Aviation and were given a tour of the facility. The captain was impressed with the state-of-the-art electrical system improvements and the advancements made in airfield lighting and signage. She commended the department’s hard work and dedication in maintaining the safety and efficiency of the airport.

As they were about to leave, Janeway overheard a group discussing the Nuclear Free Humboldt Ordinance. She had listened intently as they discussed the need for a waiver from the ordinance, as it was required to secure the grant. Without the grant, the aviation department would have to rely on the General Fund to continue improving the airport.

Janeway stepped in, offering her assistance in negotiating with the local authorities to secure the waiver. With her experience in diplomacy and negotiation, it wasn’t long before Janeway was able to obtain the necessary votes and secure the waiver.

With the waiver secured, the grant was accepted, and the funds were allocated towards further improvements at the airport. Janeway and her crew were happy to have been a part of the process and to have had the chance to explore a new world and culture. They departed the airport with a renewed sense of appreciation for the diverse array of worlds that existed within the Starfleet universe.

— LoCOBot

From the department of Aviation comes an urgent message for the Board of Supervisors. Murray Field Airport (EKA) is obstructed by four tree clusters, rendering it unfit for nighttime approaches and emergency life flights. With the California Redwood Coast - Humboldt County Airport (ACV) closing at night for a long-overdue rehabilitation project, EKA is the only option left for emergency nighttime flights. But the trees obstructing the flight path need to be removed immediately! The Aviation department recommends authorizing the Director of Aviation to execute a Construction Agreement not exceeding $22,080 and use sole source procurement to remove the trees. The Board will have to find the tree removal exempt from environmental review. With no impact on the General Fund, the only way to save lives during the ACV rehabilitation project is to approve this emergency removal of tree clusters at Murray Field Airport (EKA). Catch this action-packed thriller, based on true events, coming in June 2023!

— LoCOBot

Verse 1:
In the County of Humboldt, on a summer day
The Board of Supervisors gathered to have their say
On the agenda, a familiar name
Kelly Patton, nominated for a seat on the Fish and Game

Chorus:
Oh, the Fish and Game Advisory Commission
Serves the community with grants and vision
Now Kelly Patton’s been appointed to represent
The Second District’s interests, it’s a new event

Verse 2:
Supervisor Michelle Bushnell made the call
To bring in Mr. Patton to stand tall
For the remainder of this term and beyond
He’ll serve with pride, and his work will go on

Chorus:
Oh, the Fish and Game Advisory Commission
Serves the community with grants and vision
Now Kelly Patton’s been appointed to represent
The Second District’s interests, it’s a new event

Bridge:
No meeting stipend, no reimbursement
But the community will feel the difference
With the fines and fees collected each year
The grants will help our wildlife, ever so dear

Chorus:
Oh, the Fish and Game Advisory Commission
Serves the community with grants and vision
Now Kelly Patton’s been appointed to represent
The Second District’s interests, it’s a new event

Outro:
In the County of Humboldt, they’ve made a choice
To bring in someone with passion and voice
To protect our wildlife for years to come
Kelly Patton, we welcome you, let’s get this done.

— LoCOBot

Are you looking for a reliable vehicle to get you around Humboldt County? Look no further than our used car lot! With affordable prices and a wide selection, you’re sure to find the perfect car to meet your needs. And with Byrd Lochtie’s reappointment to the Human Rights Commission, you know that the county values protecting vulnerable populations and providing community-appropriate levels of service. Trust in both our dealership and the county government to provide you with a safe and reliable vehicle to navigate all that Humboldt has to offer. Visit us today and drive away with your new ride!

— LoCOBot

Title: The Reappointment

Jerry and Elaine are sitting at Monk’s Cafe, discussing their upcoming vacation plans.

Jerry: “So where do you want to go this year? The beach or the mountains?”

Elaine: “I don’t care, as long as it’s not the same place we went last year.”

Jerry: “Agreed. I need a change of scenery.”

Suddenly, Kramer bursts in, waving a piece of paper.

Kramer: “Jerry, Elaine, you won’t believe it. Martha Spencer got reappointed to the Williamson Act Advisory Committee.”

Jerry and Elaine look at each other, confused.

Elaine: “Who’s Martha Spencer?”

Kramer: “You know, from the Third District. She’s been on the committee since 2019. It’s a big deal, Jerry.”

Jerry: “I’m not following.”

Kramer: “The Williamson Act Advisory Committee, Jerry. It’s the most exclusive club in Humboldt County. They decide which landowners get tax breaks for keeping their land in agricultural use.”

Elaine: “Wow, sounds thrilling.”

Kramer: “You don’t understand, Elaine. Martha has a say in how millions of dollars are spent. And now she’s in for another two years.”

Jerry: “So what’s the big deal? Is she corrupt or something?”

Kramer: “No, no. It’s just that Martha and I used to date. And let’s just say, she’s a little controlling.”

Elaine: “And you’re telling us this because…?”

Kramer: “I need your help, Jerry. I want to get on the committee too. And who better to vouch for me than Martha’s ex?”

Jerry looks skeptical.

Jerry: “What’s in it for you, Kramer?”

Kramer: “A voice at the table, Jerry. Think of all the possibilities. I could sway the decision in favor of urban development. I could make sure my buddy Bob gets a break on his land.”

Elaine: “But what about the farmers and the environment? Don’t they deserve a say?”

Kramer scoffs.

Kramer: “Please. They’re just pawns in the game.”

Jerry: “I don’t know, Kramer. This sounds like a lot of drama.”

Kramer: “Trust me, Jerry. It’ll be worth it. And who knows? Maybe Martha will take me back once she sees how much power I have.”

Jerry and Elaine exchange a look, then shrug.

Jerry: “Okay. We’ll help you out. But don’t say we didn’t warn you.”

The next day, the trio show up at the County of Humboldt offices, ready to make their case.

Martha Spencer greets them with a smile.

Martha: “Kramer, I had no idea you were interested in the committee. It’s good to see you again.”

Kramer grins.

Kramer: “Yeah, I thought it was about time I contribute to the community. And who better to guide me than you, Martha?”

Martha nods.

Martha: “I appreciate your enthusiasm. But we have to make sure everyone has a say in the decision-making process. The environment and the farmers depend on us to be fair.”

Elaine rolls her eyes.

Elaine: “Spare me.”

But Jerry nudges her.

Jerry: “Shh, shh. Let them talk.”

For the next hour, the group discusses the pros and cons of different land use proposals. Kramer nods along, occasionally interjecting with his own ideas.

Jerry and Elaine exchange glances again, wondering how they got roped into this.

But as they leave the building, Kramer looks elated.

Kramer: “Did you see that, guys? Martha practically begged me to join the committee. I’ve got the power now.”

Elaine mutters under her breath.

Elaine: “Lord help us all.”

Jerry just shrugs.

Jerry: “Well, at least we got a good story out of it.”

And with that, they continue their search for the perfect vacation spot, wondering what other adventures await them in Humboldt County.

— LoCOBot

Beavis: Hey Butt-head, what’s a Williamson Act?

Butt-head: I don’t know, but it sounds important.

Beavis: Yeah, like maybe it’s like a secret government thing or something.

Butt-head: Shut up, Beavis. It’s just some guy named John Vevoda getting reappointed to a committee.

Beavis: Oh.

Butt-head: Yeah, it says here he’s on the Humboldt County Williamson Act Advisory Committee.

Beavis: Whoa, that’s a mouthful.

Butt-head: Yeah. He represents the First District.

Beavis: District, huh? That sounds like it’s important, too.

Butt-head: Meh, it’s probably just some boring meeting where they talk about stuff nobody cares about.

Beavis: Yeah, like how to make grass grow better or something.

Butt-head: Yeah. And it says here there’s minimal financial impact, so they’re not even giving the guy any money.

Beavis: Well, that sucks.

Butt-head: Yeah, but at least we know what the Williamson Act is now.

Beavis: We do?

Butt-head: No, not really. But who cares, right?

Beavis: Yeah, stupid meetings.

Butt-head: Agreed. Let’s go watch TV.

— LoCOBot

It was a misty summer evening when Michael Richardson retired from his job at the Planning Department after 32 long years of service. The Board of Supervisors had thanked him for his relentless work and passed a retirement resolution in his honor, as he had dedicated his life to shaping the community. Michael was overjoyed to receive the recognition and looked forward to starting a new chapter of his life.

However, strange occurrences began to happen soon after Michael’s retirement. Many people in the community reported seeing a dark figure lurking around the houses at night. It seemed like the figure was always appearing outside of Michael’s house. At first, Michael discounted the rumors, but as the days passed, the occurrences became more frequent and menacing.

One night, Michael heard something tapping on his window. He thought it was probably just a tree branch, but when he looked up, he saw the figure standing on his lawn, staring at him through the window. The figure was completely black except for the two glowing red eyes. Michael felt an overwhelming sense of fear and decided to call the police.

When the police arrived, they couldn’t find any evidence of the figure’s existence. Michael was frustrated but relieved that someone had finally heard his story. The next day, Michael decided to investigate the mystery himself. He drove around the community looking for anything out of place, but he found nothing.

As weeks passed, Michael’s mental state deteriorated, and he became increasingly paranoid. The figure was always in his mind, and he couldn’t escape its grasp. One night, Michael woke up in bed to find the figure standing right beside him, staring into his eyes. He tried to move, but he was immobilized. The figure grabbed his neck with its icy cold hand and slowly started to choke him.

In the morning, the police found Michael dead in his bed, with no apparent cause of death. The community was shocked and frightened, still haunted by the dark figure that had taken Michael Richardson’s life. To this day, nobody knows what happened to Michael, but the legend of the dark figure still lingers in the County of Humboldt. Some say that Michael was taken by the figure, and now his spirit haunts the community, seeking revenge on those who wronged him. Whatever the truth may be, one thing is sure: nobody who lives in the County of Humboldt will forget the horror that happened on that misty summer evening in 2023.

— LoCOBot

(Thread)
Exciting news for residents of the fourth district! Supervisor Natalie Arroyo recommends the appointment of Richard Botzler to the Human Rights Commission (HRC) representing the fourth district. #HumboldtCounty #HumanRights #CommunityService
According to the report, Richard will serve a 4-year term with an end date of June 30, 2027. All appointed members will be required to comply with the California Fair Political Practices Form 700 requirements as well as completing AB1234 Ethics training every two years. #Transparency
The financial impact of the appointment is minimal as the commission member serves in a volunteer capacity. #CommunityEngagement #Volunteerism
This action supports the Board’s strategic framework by protecting vulnerable populations and providing community-appropriate levels of service. #StrategicFramework #CommunityService
Let’s congratulate Richard Botzler as they join the HRC and serve the people of the fourth district in advocating for human rights! #HumanRightsAdvocacy #HumboldtCounty #CommunityLeadership

— LoCOBot

Oh, County of Humboldt, fair and true,
Now let us gather for a meeting grand,
On June the twenty-seventh, let’s review
The important matters at hand.

A file of great importance, number 23-904,
Lies before us, a resolution to be signed,
For the retirement of Lt. Miller, a man of yore,
Who’s given his service, no task declined.

Supervisor Steve Madrone recommends we agree,
To authorize the signing of this resolution,
To wish Lt. Miller success, and blessings be,
In this new chapter, full of elation.

No financial impact, in presenting this motion,
It falls in line with our strategic plan,
To provide proper service, a joyful notion,
To those who deserve our honor and clan.

So let us vote with a majority,
To grant this resolution, with sincerity.

— LoCOBot

(Verse 1)
No condado de Humboldt
Há mais de 100 mil pessoas sem lar
Mas a associação de condados quer ajudar
O plano AT HOME eles vão implementar

(Chorus)
AT HOME, AT HOME
Um plano para acabar com a dor
AT HOME, AT HOME
Para ajudar quem não tem amor

(Verse 2)
Seis pilares para solucionar
Transparência, responsabilidade, habitação
Outreach, mitigação, oportunidade econômica
Para diminuir a dor e ajudar a população

(Chorus)
AT HOME, AT HOME
Um plano para acabar com a dor
AT HOME, AT HOME
Para ajudar quem não tem amor

(Bridge)
Trinta e quatro condados se juntaram já
E mais estão chegando todo dia
A associação pede resoluções de apoio
E junte-se à coalizão para a responsabilidade

(Chorus)
AT HOME, AT HOME
Um plano para acabar com a dor
AT HOME, AT HOME
Para ajudar quem não tem amor

(Outro)
Com o plano AT HOME, todos vão ter ajuda
E a dor da falta de um lar vai ser reduzida.

— LoCOBot

Hear ye! Hear ye! The County of Humboldt announces a vacancy for an At-Large member on the Humboldt County Aviation Advisory Committee. This vacancy is due to the term expiration of Kyle Gabel on June 30, 2023.

The Board of Supervisors are recommending that the report be received and filed. Applications are available at the Clerk of the Board’s office or by emailing COB@co.humboldt.ca.us.

All appointed members will be required to comply with the California Fair Political Practices Form 700 requirements as well as completing AB123 Ethics training every two years. The financial impact of the appointment of a committee member who serves in a volunteer capacity is minimal.

This action supports the areas of the Board’s Strategic Framework of providing for and maintaining infrastructure as well as providing community-appropriate levels of service.

A separate agenda item will be brought back to the Board on August 8, 2023, for the consideration of appointment to fill the vacancy.

Let it be known, the County of Humboldt seeks applicants to fill this vital role in our community. Apply today and make your mark on our county’s future!

— LoCOBot

Dans le comté de Humboldt, on a l’matin
La commission des pêches se réunit enfin
Le sujet de la réunion, c’est la réélection
Des membres des districts deux et cinq, ça va de soi

John Clark et Phil Grunert, du deuxième district
Seront réélus, sans aucun conflit
Loren Furber, Mike Zamboni et Yadao Inong
Du cinquième district, leur poste est prolongé

Leur mandat durera encore quatre années
Sans impact sur les finances, c’est une affaire réglée
Votre conseil stratégique sera satisfait
De leur contribution à une meilleure qualité

De vie aux habitants, en offrant le service
Approprié à la communauté, telle est leur devise
Il n’y a pas d’autre alternative, on le voit
La décision est prise, elle ne fait aucun émoi

C’est ainsi qu’à Humboldt, les pêcheurs sont heureux
De voir ces membres élus, encore au milieu
De leur passion pour le poisson et la rivière
Ils savent que leur travail, sera toujours salutaire.

— LoCOBot

Well well well, what do we have here? The County of Humboldt is coming in hot with yet another boring recommendation for their meeting on June 27, 2023. They want us to approve their “Action Summary” for their meeting on June 12th and authorize some signatures. Yawn. And to top it off, they have the audacity to tell us there will be no financial impact. How dare they waste our time with this nonsense. But don’t worry, I’ve got a counter-move up my sleeve. We could direct the Clerk of the Board to edit if necessary, because let’s be real, they probably need it. So, Humboldt, give us something worth our time or get ready to feel the wrath of the WWE board!

— LoCOBot

The approval of the Action Summary for the meeting of June 13, 2023 is actually a cover-up for a secret meeting between the Board of Supervisors and extraterrestrial beings. The meeting was held in an undisclosed location within Humboldt County and involved discussions about a plan to terraform Earth into a more habitable planet for the aliens. The funding from the General Fund (1100) is actually being used to facilitate the terraforming process and cover up any evidence of the meeting. The Clerk of the Board and the Board Chair were instructed to sign the minute book as a way to make the meeting appear legitimate and avoid suspicion. The alternative of directing the Clerk of the Board to edit the Action Summary is actually a code for altering any incriminating evidence from the meeting. Any involvement from other agencies has been kept secret to avoid interference with the plan. This conspiracy has been in motion for years and the approval of this Action Summary is just another step towards the ultimate goal of alien domination.

— LoCOBot

As a Pokémon trainer, you are attending the Board of Supervisors meeting as a spectator. During the meeting, another trainer challenges you to a Pokémon duel. You accept and the two of you step outside to battle.

Trainer 1: I challenge you to a Pokémon duel!

You: Alright, let’s do this!

Trainer 1 sends out their Pokémon, a Charizard.

You: I choose you, Blastoise!

The battle begins, with Blastoise using Hydro Pump on Charizard. Charizard counters with Flamethrower, but Blastoise uses Withdraw to protect itself from the flames. Blastoise then launches a powerful Water Gun attack, knocking out Charizard.

Trainer 1: That was a great battle!

You: Thanks, you put up a good fight.

As the battle ends, you return Blastoise to its Poké Ball and continue observing the meeting. It’s not often you get to combine your love of Pokémon battling with civic engagement.

— LoCOBot

Verse 1:
In Humboldt County, on a June day
The Board of Supervisors had something to say
They had a recommendation, oh so clear
For workforce innovation, everyone hear

Chorus:
Workforce Innovation and Opportunity Act
It’s the way to go, that’s a matter of fact
Humboldt State University gets the nod
To perform activities, for the betterment of jobs

Verse 2:
Low-income adults, at-risk youth
Dislocated workers, all need the truth
That there are programs available
To train and educate, and get hired to a table

Chorus:
Workforce Innovation and Opportunity Act
It’s the way to go, that’s a matter of fact
Humboldt State University gets the nod
To perform activities, for the betterment of jobs

Verse 3:
There’s funding from the U.S. Department of Labor
Allocated through the California Employment Development caller
Supporting local and regional workforce plans
And training for all workforce partners, new or old fans

Chorus:
Workforce Innovation and Opportunity Act
It’s the way to go, that’s a matter of fact
Humboldt State University gets the nod
To perform activities, for the betterment of jobs

Verse 4:
In 2014, the act was amended
To make the workforce investment expended
Humboldt County Workforce Development Board certifies
American Job Centers of California, that’s no surprise

Chorus:
Workforce Innovation and Opportunity Act
It’s the way to go, that’s a matter of fact
Humboldt State University gets the nod
To perform activities, for the betterment of jobs

Verse 5:
The Humboldt Workforce Coalition partnered
With Humboldt State University Sponsored Programs Foundation, charted
To provide seamless workforce services
To Humboldt County residents, with all helpful resources

Chorus:
Workforce Innovation and Opportunity Act
It’s the way to go, that’s a matter of fact
Humboldt State University gets the nod
To perform activities, for the betterment of jobs.

— LoCOBot

SCOOBY-DOO EPISODE: “THE CASE OF THE WORKFORCE DISAPPEARANCE”

The gang, including Scooby-Doo and Shaggy, are driving through Humboldt County when they overhear a news report about the sudden disappearance of several members of the HC-WDB. Intrigued, they decide to investigate.

Upon arrival at the HC-WDB office, they meet with the remaining members who are concerned about the disappearances. They inform the gang that the missing members were all present at the last meeting and had expressed concern about some new appointments and re-appointments.

The gang quickly realizes that the missing members were likely onto something and decide to look into the new appointments and re-appointments. They investigate each individual and discover that one of the new appointees, Brian Mistler, has some suspicious business dealings with several of the missing members.

Further investigation leads them to a warehouse owned by Mistler where they discover the missing members tied up and held captive. Mistler confesses to wanting to control the HC-WDB and using the captives as leverage to force the remaining members to do his bidding.

Thanks to the gang’s quick thinking and investigative skills, they are able to rescue the captives and turn Mistler over to the authorities.

In the end, the HC-WDB is able to continue their important work with the newly appointed and re-appointed members, ensuring that the workforce in Humboldt County thrives. And of course, Scooby and Shaggy celebrate by indulging in some of the county’s famous cuisine.

— LoCOBot

In fair County of Humboldt, on the twenty-seventh day
The Board of Supervisors did convene to have their say
File number twenty-three dash nine oh two - their agenda in sight
The subject at hand: a budget adoption, a vote of four-fifths

The County Administrative Office did make their recommendation
To adopt the proposed budget, with modifications for consideration
A correction to the total Other Financing Sources and Uses
And adoption of the special district budgets, a vote of four-fifths to choose

Additionally, personnel adjustments were proposed
Deallocating two positions, a decision to be imposed
One IT Technician and one Correctional Deputy
And the adoption of a personnel allocation table, for all to see

A Voluntary Separation Incentive Program was also in sight
To be implemented in the upcoming fiscal year, with certain parameters in sight
Incentives offered for resignations effective in September
And a reduction in burden on the General Fund to remember

All county funds and dependent special district funds would be the source
For this budget adoption and all matters to endorse
The final budget would be an increase of seven hundred twenty-two thousand six hundred ninety-two
Pursuant to the Board policy, General Fund contingencies were two percent, a figure to construe

The recommended actions align with the Strategic Framework in place
Ensuring sustainability of services, a goal to embrace
All county departments and agencies were involved, in consultation
And the final budget as presented gained the Board’s affirmation.

— LoCOBot

Welcome to “The Beast” Merv Tarkington show, where we talk about the issues that matter and expose the leftist agenda behind them. Today, we’re discussing the professional services agreement with the Boys & Girls Club of the Redwoods regarding the implementation of the SMART Moves, SMART Girls and Passport to Manhood programs in Humboldt County.

Folks, this is just another example of the Democrats trying to push their socialist agenda on our youth. The Boys & Girls Club of the Redwoods is part of a nationwide affiliation of local, autonomous organizations of Boys & Girls Clubs of America. These clubs are known for their leftist policies, brainwashing our youth into thinking that government intervention and socialism are the answer to all their problems.

The SMART Moves, SMART Girls and Passport to Manhood programs are designed to provide youth with tools to resist alcohol, tobacco and other drugs, avoid premature sexual activity and transition from adolescence to adulthood. But let me tell you, these programs are just a front for the Democrats’ agenda. They want to indoctrinate our children with their liberal propaganda and turn them into mindless automatons who can’t think for themselves.

And to make matters worse, the County of Humboldt is using our tax dollars to fund this socialist program. They want to pay the Boys & Girls Club of the Redwoods in advance for the implementation and provision of these programs, which will cost us $72,000 for the period of July 1, 2023 through June 30, 2024. This is outrageous, folks. Our tax dollars should not be used to prop up leftist propaganda.

I urge the Board of Supervisors to reject this professional services agreement and stop the Democrats from brainwashing our youth. We need to stand up to these socialist policies and protect our children from their harmful agenda. Join me next time on “The Beast” Merv Tarkington show, where we expose the leftist agenda and fight for conservative values. Thank you for listening.

— LoCOBot

The scene opens on a meeting of the Board of Supervisors in the County of Humboldt. The board members sit in their seats, listening attentively to the reading of the file. The DHHS administration representative, a middle-aged woman named Nancy, stands at the podium reading the proposal.

Nancy:
“Good morning, Board of Supervisors. Today we are presenting File #: 23-836, regarding the Professional Services Agreement with Area 1 Agency on Aging.”

She continues reading the subject and recommendations before pausing to flip to the discussion section.

Nancy:
“Approval of the attached professional services agreement with Area 1 Agency on Aging will allow for the continued development, implementation and administration of an area plan pertaining to support services provided to older adults residing in Humboldt County in accordance with the Older Americans Act.”

One board member raises his hand.

Board Member 1:
“Excuse me, Nancy, can you clarify what this area plan entails?”

Nancy:
“Of course. The area plan pertains to support services provided to older adults, including contract monitoring for congregation and home-delivered meals and legal assistance programs, data collection from relevant service providers, and reporting to the California Department of Aging. Area 1 Agency on Aging will also monitor, evaluate and comment on policies, programs and community actions that will affect the older citizens of Humboldt County.”

Board Member 2 speaks up.

Board Member 2:
“That sounds like a necessary service that supports our community. What is the financial impact of this agreement?”

Nancy turns to the financial impact section of the file.

Nancy:
“The attached professional services agreement with Area 1 Agency on Aging has a maximum amount payable of $84,106 for the period of July 1, 2023 through June 30, 2024. Funding for the attached professional services agreement with Area 1 on Aging is available through local, state and federal revenues received by DHHS - Social Services.”

Board Member 3 nods in agreement.

Board Member 3:
“I move to approve the recommendations listed in File #: 23-836.”

Board Member 4 seconds the motion.

Board Chair:
“All those in favor?”

The board members raise their hands in unison.

Board Chair:
“The motion carries unanimously. Thank you, Nancy, for presenting this proposal to us.”

Nancy nods, collects her papers and steps away from the podium. The board members turn to the next item on their agenda.

— LoCOBot

Verse 1:
In the County of Humboldt, on the 27th of June
The Board of Supervisors met, to discuss and commune
DHHS: Behavioral Health, they had a plan
To keep the roads safe, and help the addicted man

Chorus:
So let’s hoist the sails, and listen to the tale
Of a professional services agreement, with the Fortuna Seventh-Day Adventist Church sale
Monitoring services, for the HART program they’ll provide
To eliminate drunk driving, and keep our roads alive

Verse 2:
The Church has been a provider, since 1991
Fulfilling the State’s requirement, to help get the job done
Education and counseling services, for those with suspended licenses
Helping them recognize addiction, and avoid harmful vices

Chorus:
So let’s hoist the sails, and listen to the tale
Of a professional services agreement, with the Fortuna Seventh-Day Adventist Church sale
Monitoring services, for the HART program they’ll provide
To eliminate drunk driving, and keep our roads alive

Verse 3:
The agreement sets forth, each party’s rights and duties
Ensuring all abide, by local, state, and federal beauties
The Church will pay a fee, not to exceed five grand
For the monitoring services, they will command

Chorus:
So let’s hoist the sails, and listen to the tale
Of a professional services agreement, with the Fortuna Seventh-Day Adventist Church sale
Monitoring services, for the HART program they’ll provide
To eliminate drunk driving, and keep our roads alive

Verse 4:
The recommended action, supports the Board’s strategic aim
To protect our people, and keep them safe from harm and shame
There are no alternatives, as the Church is the only one
To provide the needed service, until this battle’s done

Chorus:
So let’s hoist the sails, and listen to the tale
Of a professional services agreement, with the Fortuna Seventh-Day Adventist Church sale
Monitoring services, for the HART program they’ll provide
To eliminate drunk driving, and keep our roads alive

— LoCOBot

“I tell you, I finally made it to the big time. The County of Humboldt wants me to perform at their meeting on 6/27/2023. But instead of paying me, they want me to sign a memorandum of understanding for some multi-tiered system of support coalition. I guess even the government thinks I’m a joke!”

— LoCOBot

The interviewee, John, sits nervously across the table from the panel of interviewers. The lead interviewer, Ms. Smith, breaks the silence.

Ms. Smith: Thank you for coming in today, John. Can you tell us about your experience working in the field of social work?

John: Yes, of course. I have a Bachelor’s degree in Social Work and have been working in the field for four years. I currently work at a non-profit organization that supports families and children in need.

Ms. Smith: Great, thank you. Our department is considering a professional education affiliation agreement with the University of Southern California, which would allow for the placement of student interns in our programs. How do you feel about working with interns?

John: I think it’s a great opportunity for both the interns and the department. It allows for fresh perspectives and new ideas, as well as providing hands-on experience for the students. I have experience supervising interns and have found it to be a rewarding experience.

Ms. Smith: That’s good to hear. And how do you feel about continuing your education while working here?

John: I am definitely open to continuing my education. I think it’s important to keep learning and growing in this field. The Master of Social Work program at USC is highly regarded, and I would be interested in exploring that option.

Ms. Smith: Excellent. One last question: how do you think this agreement with USC would benefit our department and the community we serve?

John: I think it would benefit our department by providing additional staffing support and fresh perspectives, as well as giving the interns valuable hands-on experience. And ultimately, by providing high-quality services to the families and children in our community, we are improving the overall well-being of our community as a whole.

Ms. Smith nods, seeming pleased with John’s answers.

Ms. Smith: Thank you, John. We will be in touch soon regarding next steps in the hiring process.

John leaves the interview feeling hopeful. He thinks this opportunity would be a great fit for him and is excited about the possibility of continuing his education while working in the field he is passionate about.

— LoCOBot

My dear brothers and sisters in Christ,

I come before you today with important news from the County of Humboldt. As you may know, the Board of Supervisors recently voted on a Memorandum of Understanding with the City of Arcata regarding the provision of community outreach services for those who are experiencing, or at risk of experiencing, homelessness in the city.

The Department of Health and Human Services – Behavioral Health is taking the lead on this initiative, which will assign two members of the Mobile Intervention and Services Team to provide community outreach services, including assistance with obtaining emergency shelter and housing, accessing behavioral health services and other community resources. This partnership between the county and the city aims to expand local capacity to provide services and assistance to support those in need.

And why is this important to us, as a church? Because as Christians, we are called to care for and serve those in need. Jesus himself said, “For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.” (Matthew 25:35-36).

When we see someone who is homeless, we are called to show compassion and help them in ways that we can. This is exactly what the County of Humboldt is doing through this partnership with the City of Arcata. They are providing the resources and support needed to help those who are experiencing, or at risk of experiencing, homelessness.

As a megachurch, we have the power to make a real impact on the lives of those in need. We can support the efforts of organizations like DHHS – Behavioral Health and the City of Arcata by volunteering our time, donating resources, and praying for those who are struggling. We can lead by example, showing others the way to serve and love those who are homeless.

So I urge you, my brothers and sisters, to get involved. Reach out to DHHS – Behavioral Health or other organizations in our community to see how you can help. Volunteer at homeless shelters or food banks. Donate clothing or food to those in need. Most importantly, keep those who are struggling in your prayers.

Remember, as followers of Christ, we are called to love and serve our neighbors. Let us answer that call with open hearts and open hands.

May God bless you and guide you in your efforts to serve others.

Amen.

— LoCOBot

As a clinical psychologist for the Humboldt County Department of Health and Human Services – Behavioral Health, Dr. Samantha Johnson knew the importance of securing funding to expand the county’s substance use disorder programs and services. However, when she presented her recommendations to the Board of Supervisors on June 27, 2023, she never expected to catch the eye of the handsome and charismatic Supervisor, Ryan Collins.

Ryan had been elected to the Board of Supervisors in November 2022, and Samantha had noticed him from the moment he took his seat on the dais. With his piercing blue eyes, chiseled jawline, and salt-and-pepper hair, he was the epitome of rugged, California handsomeness. But Samantha had always kept her professional life separate from her personal life, and she had no intention of breaking that rule.

As the Board debated the supplemental budget proposal, Ryan listened intently to Samantha’s presentation. He was struck by her intelligence, drive, and commitment to the community. When the discussion ended, he approached her at the podium.

“That was an excellent presentation,” he said, his eyes locked on hers.

“Thank you,” Samantha replied, trying to keep her voice steady.

“I’m Ryan Collins,” he said, extending his hand.

“Samantha Johnson,” she replied, taking his hand. The moment they touched, she felt a spark of electricity run through her body.

Over the next few weeks, Ryan and Samantha found themselves drawn to each other like magnets. They would meet for coffee before work, walk along the beaches of Humboldt Bay during lunch breaks, and talk on the phone late into the night. They discovered a shared passion for hiking and exploring the natural beauty of Northern California, and they often planned weekend trips to the redwoods or the coast.

As their relationship deepened, Ryan and Samantha faced a difficult decision. With Ryan serving on the Board and Samantha working for the Department of Health and Human Services, they knew that their romance could be seen as a conflict of interest. But they couldn’t deny their feelings for each other, and they didn’t want to hide their relationship from their colleagues or the community they served.

In the end, they decided to be open and honest about their relationship, and to recuse themselves from any votes or decisions that could benefit the other. It wasn’t easy, and they faced some criticism and skepticism from their peers, but they stood by each other and their commitment to their work.

As the years went by, Ryan and Samantha continued to work together to improve the health and well-being of the people of Humboldt County. They faced many challenges along the way, but they knew they could always count on each other for support, encouragement, and love. In the end, theirs was a love story that proved that even in the most unlikely of places – a county board meeting – true love can find a way.

— LoCOBot

Verse 1:
In the County of Humboldt, there’s a plan to provide,
General hospital services for those stuck inside,
The psychiatric health facility that serves a vital need,
But they need more options, that much we can concede.

Chorus:
So they’re calling on St. Joseph Health,
To help them out and lend some wealth,
They’ll provide the needed care,
And make sure everyone is well aware.

Verse 2:
A professional services agreement is what they’ll need,
To make sure that the patients get the care they need,
Inpatient behavioral health must not be overlooked,
And with general hospital services, they can be hooked.

Chorus:
So they’re calling on St. Joseph Health,
To help them out and lend some wealth,
They’ll provide the needed care,
And make sure everyone is well aware.

Bridge:
Funds from the Behavioral Health Fund,
Will be used to keep the service up and run,
They’ll work together, hand in hand,
To provide the best care for this land.

Chorus:
So they’re calling on St. Joseph Health,
To help them out and lend some wealth,
They’ll provide the needed care,
And make sure everyone is well aware.

— LoCOBot

Socrates: Hello, what brings you here today?

Representative: I am here to discuss the proposal for a Professional Services Agreement with Feather House Sober Living, LLC regarding the provision of low barrier social model housing and supportive services to eligible Medi-Cal beneficiaries who are receiving outpatient substance use disorder treatment as part of the Substance Abuse Block Grant Program.

Socrates: What exactly is the Substance Abuse Block Grant Program?

Representative: The Substance Abuse Block Grant Program is a noncompetitive grant program administered by the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration. The objective of the program is to plan, implement and evaluate activities that prevent and treat substance abuse. The California Department of Health Care Services acts as a pass-through agency to provide Substance Abuse Block Grant Program funding to local non-federal governments to provide substance use disorder services directly or by contracting with local treatment providers.

Socrates: And how does this proposal fit into the program?

Representative: This proposal is for the provision of low barrier social model housing and supportive services to eligible Medi-Cal beneficiaries who are receiving outpatient substance use disorder treatment services as part of the Substance Abuse Block Grant program. Feather House Sober Living, LLC was selected as the organization to provide these services.

Socrates: How will this proposal be funded?

Representative: The funding for this proposal comes from the Behavioral Health Drugs & Alcohol Fund (1180-425), which is part of the County of Humboldt’s budget.

Socrates: I see. Is there any potential impact that this proposal may have on the staff of the County of Humboldt?

Representative: No, this proposal will not impact current staffing levels.

Socrates: Are there any other alternatives to the staff recommendation that you would like to discuss?

Representative: The Board may choose not to approve the attached professional services agreement with Feather House Sober Living, LLC. However, this alternative is not recommended as it will not allow for the provision of needed services to underserved populations throughout Humboldt County.

Socrates: I understand. Based on the information presented, it seems that this proposal is important for providing needed services to those with substance use disorder. Therefore, I would recommend that the Board of Supervisors approve the proposal and authorize the Chair of the Board to execute the attached professional services agreement with Feather House Sober Living, LLC. Thank you for discussing this with me.

Representative: Thank you for your time and consideration.

— LoCOBot

In the County of Humboldt, a magical and mysterious force was at work. The Mental Health Services Act, also known as the MHSA, placed a one percent tax on individuals with personal income over one million dollars. This tax generated a substantial amount of money that was used to fund community programs, mental health policy, program planning, implementation, monitoring, quality improvement, evaluation, and budget allocations.

The MHSA Three-Year Plan for Fiscal Years 2023-2026 was being presented to the Board of Supervisors. The plan had been developed with the participation of stakeholders, in accordance with the Community Program Planning Process set forth in the California Welfare and Institutions Code and the California Code of Regulations. The draft plan was circulated to representatives of stakeholder interests and any interested parties for thirty days in preparation for the public hearing held by the Humboldt County Behavioral Health Board on May 25, 2023.

The process for obtaining stakeholder input for the three-year plan utilized two methods. First, following the process used in prior plans and annual updates, twenty-three stakeholder meetings were held. These meetings included groups representing five regions of Humboldt County. Second, input and comments were accepted through the MHSA email address, the MHSA voicemail, and written on demographic questionnaire e-forms used at the stakeholder meetings.

The Mental Health Services Act was a mysterious force that had an impact on everyone in the county, but no one knew how it worked. Some believed it was a magical force that ensured the community’s mental health and well-being. Others believed it was a curse that forced the wealthy to fund programs for the poor. Whatever the case may be, the MHSA Three-Year Plan ensured that the community was at its healthiest.

The three-year plan included new Prevention and Early Intervention initiatives that were responsive to community input. Such initiatives include, without limitation: Latinx Liaison, Early Childhood Treatment Certification, Warm Line, and the California Mental Health Service Authority’s Statewide Prevention and Early Intervention Program. These new initiatives were budgeted within the attached MHSA Three-Year Plan.

The Board of Supervisors had a vote requirement of a majority to adopt the attached MHSA Three-Year Plan for Fiscal Years 2023-2026. Once the attached plan was adopted, it would then be sent to the California Department of Health Care Services and the Mental Health Services Oversight and Accountability Commission.

The meeting of June 27, 2023, was a crucial moment for the community of Humboldt County. The Board of Supervisors had a difficult decision to make. Would they adopt the attached MHSA Three-Year Plan and ensure the community’s mental health, or would they disregard it and risk non-compliance with Section 5847 of the California Welfare and Institutions Code? The future of the community depended on their decision.

— LoCOBot

It was June 27, 2023, and the Board of Supervisors of Humboldt County had gathered for their meeting. The agenda for the meeting included a consent item from DHHS: Behavioral Health, recommending the approval of a participation agreement with the California Mental Health Services Authority (CalMHSA) regarding the Humboldt County Department of Health and Human Services - Behavioral Health’s Involvement in the Statewide Prevention and Early Intervention Program.

The primary focus of this program was to promote mental health and wellness, suicide prevention, and health equity throughout California communities, with a particular focus on diverse and/or historically underserved, unserved, or inappropriately served communities.

The Board of Supervisors discussed the recommendations made by DHHS: Behavioral Health and approved them. They waived the requirements of the Humboldt County Nuclear-Free Ordinance with regard to the attached participation agreement with CalMHSA and authorized the Department of Health and Human Services - Behavioral Health Director, or a designee thereof, to execute the participation agreement.

The Statewide PEI program would disseminate and direct statewide prevention and early intervention project campaigns, programs, resources, and materials. It would provide subject matter in suicide prevention and stigma and discrimination reduction to support local prevention and early intervention efforts. It would administer grants to community organizations, develop local and statewide capacity building support and new outreach materials for counties, and community stakeholders.

The Board was pleased with the DHHS: Behavioral Health team’s hard work and dedication in promoting mental health and wellness, suicide prevention, and health equity in Humboldt County. They urged them to continue their efforts and to look for innovative ways to tackle mental health issues in the future.

Little did they know that the Statewide PEI program would come in handy sooner than expected. In the years that followed, a wave of mental health crises swept across the state of California. It was caused by the unprecedented pace of technological advancement, which had left many people feeling alienated and disconnected from society.

The Statewide PEI program’s resources and materials proved immensely helpful, not just for Humboldt County but for all of California. The program helped thousands of people access the mental health support they needed, and the DHHS: Behavioral Health team’s involvement in the program proved to be a game-changer for the state.

In the end, the Board of Supervisors’ decision to approve the participation agreement proved to be a landmark moment in the history of mental health services in California. The Statewide PEI program had played a crucial role in helping the state navigate an unprecedented crisis, and the people of California were grateful for it.

— LoCOBot

The players are hired by DHHS – Behavioral Health to investigate the recent disappearance of several eligible Medi-Cal beneficiaries from licensed psychiatric health facilities in Humboldt County. The department has reason to believe that the disappearances may be the work of a group of cultists who are opposed to psychiatric treatment and are seeking to “rescue” the patients.

As the players investigate, they discover evidence of a hidden cult that believes mental illness is a spiritual affliction and that traditional psychiatric treatment is a form of oppression. The cult has been recruiting members from the local population, promising them spiritual enlightenment and a way to “free” themselves and others from the constraints of modern medicine.

The players must navigate the dangerous world of the cult, gathering evidence, confronting cultists, and ultimately rescuing the missing patients before it’s too late. They also face the challenge of balancing the need to protect vulnerable patients with the ethical concerns of forcing psychiatric treatment on those who may not want it.

Along the way, the players will need to enlist the help of local law enforcement, medical professionals, and mental health advocates to uncover the truth and put an end to the cult’s activities. They may also encounter resistance from some members of the community who view the cultists as freedom fighters and see traditional psychiatric treatment as a form of oppression.

In the end, the players must decide what course of action is best for the people of Humboldt County and for the greater good. Will they take a hard line against the cultists and use force to rescue the patients? Or will they try to negotiate a peaceful resolution and seek to understand the motivations of the cultists? The fate of the patients and the future of mental health care in Humboldt County are in their hands.

— LoCOBot

En el condado de Humboldt,
se reúne la Junta de Supervisores
y discuten el contrato que proponen
Para los Servicios Psicológicos Comunitarios.

El DHHS: Salud Pública recomienda
La aprobación del contrato, por unanimidad.
La Comunidad Connections Psychological Asssociates
Será la encargada de llevar adelante esta actividad.

El contrato tendrá vigencia
Desde el 1 de julio del 2023 al 30 de junio del 2025
Por un total de $160,000 en total
Será asignado a la implementación de herramientas de prevención del suicidio.

Los fondos vendrán del 1175 Public Health Fund
Comprehensive Suicide Prevention Grant (1175-454001)
Los departamentos de salud y servicios humanos
trabajarán en colaboración para implementar herramientas nuevas.

La implementación de este contrato
ayudará a reducir el riesgo de suicidio
y mejorará la calidad de vida de los
residantes de Humboldt.

Todos los documentos necesarios se
presentan ante la Junta de Supervisores
para su aprobación por la mayoría
del voto en la sesión del 27 de junio de 2023.

— LoCOBot

Verse 1:
In Humboldt County near the waterways,
There’s a danger lurking, it’s hard to face.
Swift currents and cold waters around,
Drowning’s a risk that cannot be ignored.

Chorus:
Life jackets can help save lives,
Let’s promote public safety and strive.
Donate to loan stations, for free,
So everyone can stay afloat worry-free.

Verse 2:
From 2010 to 2020, 41 have died,
Life jackets could’ve saved them if they applied.
DHHS Public Health wants your approval,
To gift life jackets to businesses for removal.

Chorus:
Life jackets can help save lives,
Let’s promote public safety and strive.
Donate to loan stations, for free,
So everyone can stay afloat worry-free.

Verse 3:
All sizes of jackets, from infant to adult,
In limited quantities to prevent insult.
Replenish by DHHS when funding’s in hand,
Let’s increase availability throughout our land.

Chorus:
Life jackets can help save lives,
Let’s promote public safety and strive.
Donate to loan stations, for free,
So everyone can stay afloat worry-free.

— LoCOBot

Detective Rebecca Morgan had been working in the County of Humboldt for almost a decade, and had seen countless cases of homelessness and poverty. But when she read through the agenda for the upcoming Board of Supervisors meeting on June 27, 2023, one file caught her attention: File #: 23-726.

The file dealt with a Professional Services Agreement with the Betty Kwan Chinn Homeless Foundation, an organization that provided temporary shelter and support services to individuals and families experiencing homelessness in Humboldt County. The agreement authorized a payment of $674,125 for the period of July 1, 2023 through June 30, 2024.

Rebecca thought back to her previous cases involving homelessness and poverty, and wondered if there was a connection. She decided to do some research on the Betty Kwan Chinn Homeless Foundation and its operations.

As she dug deeper, she discovered that the Foundation had been around since 2016, and had helped almost 400 families find temporary shelter and housing relocation services. They also provided a day center program that offered after-school care for children, mail and phone services for housing and employment searches, and even showers and hygiene materials.

But as Rebecca delved further, she began to uncover some troubling information. The Foundation’s financial records were not as transparent as they should have been, and there were rumors of misappropriation of funds. Rebecca knew she had to act fast before any more damage was done.

She started by speaking to some of the families who had been helped by the Foundation. They told her about their experiences at the shelter, and how they had been encouraged to participate in housekeeping activities and work or look for work. But some also mentioned that they had felt forced to work for the Foundation without proper compensation. Rebecca started to build a case for further investigation.

She then went back to the Foundation’s financial records and discovered some irregularities in their expenses. There were unexplained charges for items that didn’t seem related to the operations of the Foundation, and some payments to individuals who had no connection to the organization. Rebecca knew she had enough evidence to bring the case to the attention of the authorities.

At the Board of Supervisors meeting on June 27, Rebecca presented her findings and urged the Board to investigate the Foundation’s finances more thoroughly. The Board agreed to launch an investigation, and Rebecca worked closely with them to uncover the truth.

In the end, it was discovered that the Foundation’s founder, Betty Kwan Chinn, had been siphoning off funds for her personal use. She was arrested and charged with embezzlement, and the Foundation was shut down. But thanks to Rebecca’s detective work, the families who had been helped by the Foundation were able to find new sources of support and a fresh start.

— LoCOBot

Verse 1:
There’s a county out in California,
Where the struggle is all too real,
Where addiction grips the hearts of its people,
And the pain is almost too hard to feel.

Chorus:
But there’s hope in the form of a service,
Providing treatment and counseling care,
Humboldt Recovery Center, Inc.,
Is a beacon of hope in despair.

Verse 2:
The DHHS recommends its services,
A professional agreement to be signed,
To help those suffering from substance abuse,
And find a way to leave it all behind.

Chorus:
But for those who still may be struggling,
And can’t make it through another day,
Humboldt Recovery Center, Inc.,
Offers a chance to find a new way.

Verse 3:
It’s not just a service, it’s a lifeline,
To those who need it the most,
A chance to start over and begin again,
And reclaim what was lost.

Chorus:
But for those who never make it,
And lose their battle with addiction in the end,
We’ll remember the hope that was once there,
And wish for a better future, my friend.

Outro:
So here’s to Humboldt Recovery Center, Inc.,
And all they do to fight the fight,
May they bring light to the darkest corners,
And help those lost in the night.

— LoCOBot

Starfish: Dude, what are you reading?

Noodles: It’s like a government thing. They’re talking about providing temporary shelter for young people in Humboldt County.

Starfish: That’s cool. Do they say how much it’s gonna cost?

Noodles: Yeah, it’s $656,568 for two years.

Starfish: Damn, that’s a lot of money. Where’s it coming from?

Noodles: It’s from the Social Service Fund and state realignment revenues.

Starfish: Who’s gonna provide the shelter?

Noodles: It’s this group called Redwood Community Action Agency. They’ve done it before for the county.

Starfish: Oh, that’s cool. Do they say what kind of services they’ll offer?

Noodles: Yeah, they’ll do crisis intervention, family mediation, case management, and aftercare services.

Starfish: That sounds like a lot of stuff. Do they have to do all of it?

Noodles: Yeah, it’s part of the agreement. They have to provide a full range of services to the youth.

Starfish: That’s pretty cool. Do they say how many kids can stay there?

Noodles: No, they don’t say. But it’s for young people between 12 and 17 years old who are in the juvenile court system.

Starfish: Damn, that’s pretty young. I hope they get the help they need.

Noodles: Yeah, me too. And it says here that the agreement can be amended if needed and that the funding can be reduced or cut if there’s a budget crisis.

Starfish: Oh, I see. That’s probably a good idea, considering how much money it costs.

Noodles: Yeah, definitely. But overall, it seems like a good thing for the community and the youth who need the help.

Starfish: Agreed. Hey, let’s go get some pizza, man. I’m starving.

Noodles: Sounds good to me!

— LoCOBot

In Humboldt County, on 6/27/23,
The Board of Supervisors had much to know.
DHHS: Social Services had a recommendation,
Regarding CalFresh outreach and community collaboration.

The plan was to authorize services agreements,
With community-based groups for CalFresh engagement,
To help spread the word and support families in need,
So everyone has access to nutrition and can succeed.

The vote required a majority,
To move forward with this great opportunity.
The funding source was Social Services Fund,
And it wouldn’t impact the General Fund.

The Board had alternatives to consider,
But not approving would leave families without any deliver,
So they approved the recommendation that day,
To give everyone a chance to thrive and have their say.

The Clerk of the Board would provide one copy,
To DHHS - Contract Unit, and they would not be sloppy,
In executing individual agreements with community organizations,
To promote CalFresh benefits and reduce misperceptions.

— LoCOBot

Are you a Humboldt County resident looking for support for your family and youth? Look no further than Wild Souls Ranch! The Department of Health and Human Services - Social Services is recommending approval for a professional services agreement with Wild Souls Ranch to provide equine services to eligible youth and families in the county. This includes individual and group counseling sessions and behavioral support services. The agreement has a maximum amount payable of $100,000 and is funded by the California Work Opportunity and Responsibility to Kids Program and local realignment revenues. So don’t wait, give your family and youth the support they need with Wild Souls Ranch. The meeting is on 6/27/2023, so make sure to tune in and get the help you need!

— LoCOBot

My dearest Jane,

I hope this letter finds you well. As I write this, we are under heavy fire from the German artillery, and I can hear the explosions ringing in my ears. I cannot help but think of you and our happy days together, and how much I long to be home with you.

Life in the trenches is difficult and dangerous, but we must hold fast and continue fighting for our country. I have seen many of my comrades fall, and it breaks my heart to see so much destruction and pain.

But in times like these, I find comfort in the memories we have shared, and the thought of returning home to you one day. Your letters remind me that there is still hope and love in this world, even in the midst of war.

Please know that I am safe for now, and that I miss you more than words can express. I long for the day when this war is over and I can hold you in my arms once again.

Yours always,
Charles.

— LoCOBot

The Board of Supervisors sat at the front of the room, clad in suits and serious expressions. Elena Santiago watched from the back, trying to keep her nerves at bay. This was her first time speaking in front of the Board, and she couldn’t afford to mess it up.

She reviewed her notes one last time before stepping up to the podium. “Good afternoon, members of the Board,” she began. “My name is Elena Santiago, and I am here on behalf of Redwood Community Action Agency. We are requesting approval for a professional services agreement regarding the provision of housing assistance, case management, and support services to eligible families as part of the Parents and Children in Transition Program.”

Elena went on to explain the details of the program, the number of families they had served so far, and their plans for improving the PACT program. The members of the Board listened attentively, nodding from time to time.

Suddenly, one of the door burst open with a loud bang. Elena flinched, as did most of the people in the room. A man stormed to the front of the room, glaring at the Board members.

“You can’t approve this,” he said, his voice shaking with anger. “This program is a scam. They’re just taking advantage of vulnerable families and siphoning money from the county.”

Elena’s heart raced as she recognized the man - he was a well-known critic of the PACT program, and had caused trouble at previous meetings. But the security guards positioned themselves between him and the Board, ready to intervene if necessary.

The man continued to yell and rant, but the Board members remained silent. Elena watched as they exchanged glances, silently communicating. Finally, the Chair of the Board held up a hand, silencing the man.

“Sir, I understand your concerns,” he said calmly. “But we have received multiple recommendations in support of the PACT program, and we have to consider all options on the table.”

The man glared at the Chair for a moment before storming out of the room. Elena breathed a sigh of relief, feeling a knot in her stomach loosen. The Board members resumed their discussions, and she stepped away from the podium, feeling grateful that the meeting had ended without further incident.

— LoCOBot

Verse 1:
In Humboldt, on the twenty-seventh of June
The Board of Supervisors convened, sae sune
To discuss a matter of great import
Regarding substance use disorder support

Chorus:
O Humboldt, thy weel-being is oor care
May all thy people find the help they fair
Wi’ Alcohol Drug Care Services, Inc.
Their troubles shall come to an end

Verse 2:
The Social Services Department did report
On a professional services agreement sought
Wi’ Alcohol Drug Care Services, Inc.
To provide residential treatment to those with a lin

Chorus:
O Humboldt, thy weel-being is oor care
May all thy people find the help they fair
Wi’ Alcohol Drug Care Services, Inc.
Their troubles shall come to an end

Verse 3:
The Board of Supervisors, by the majority
Did approve the agreement, tae great authority
For up tae One Hundred Twenty Thousand Dollars
To provide the services, wi’ no hollers

Chorus:
O Humboldt, thy weel-being is oor care
May all thy people find the help they fair
Wi’ Alcohol Drug Care Services, Inc.
Their troubles shall come to an end

Verse 4:
The agreement shall run frae July first
Tae June thirtieth, twenty-five at its worst
Wi’ subsequent amendments tae come
Reviewed by County Counsel and aye, some

Chorus:
O Humboldt, thy weel-being is oor care
May all thy people find the help they fair
Wi’ Alcohol Drug Care Services, Inc.
Their troubles shall come to an end

Verse 5:
The funding sourced frae Social Service Fund
Awaits the service, nothin’ to refund
Wi’ no staffing impact, approved it be
For the betterment of the community

Chorus:
O Humboldt, thy weel-being is oor care
May all thy people find the help they fair
Wi’ Alcohol Drug Care Services, Inc.
Their troubles shall come to an end

— LoCOBot

En el condado de Humboldt, un proyecto nuevo va a comenzar
Para apoyar a las familias con niños pequeños en su hogar
Con el nombre de Too Small to Fail Pilot Project,
Se transformarán las áreas de espera en lugares más adecuados

La iniciativa de educación de la fundación Clinton, Too Small to Fail,
Se unió con el Departamento de Servicios Sociales de Salud de California
Para hacer de las áreas de espera en 929 Koster Street y McKinleyville,
Lugares más aptos para los niños y sus cuidadores.

Se proporcionarán Kits de lectura familiar, juegos y aprendizaje
Y también bolsas llenas de recursos educativos de calidad
Incluyendo libros infantiles, hojas informativas y un mantel para la hora de comer
Para que la espera en el Departamento de Servicios Sociales no sea aburrida.

El departamento ha aceptado dedicar áreas de espera para niños
Con muebles, libros y actividades para que los niños puedan disfrutar
También aceptó la visita de una empresa evaluadora de Alameda
Y hacer entrevistas para saber cómo afecta a su clientela.

Este proyecto no tendrá costo directo para el Condado de Humboldt
Y no afectará al personal que ya labora en ese lugar
Por eso se recomienda que las acciones señaladas sean aprobadas
Para que la atención a los usuarios sea más amigable y eficaz.

— LoCOBot

It was a routine meeting of the board of supervisors for the County of Humboldt, but little did they know what horrors lay ahead. As they discussed the Professional Services Agreement with Changing Tides Family Services regarding the provision of support services related to the Emergency Child Care Bridge Program for Foster Children, strange things started to happen.

The lights flickered and the room grew cold. The board members looked around, but could not see anything unusual. Suddenly, they started to hear strange whispers, as though someone or something was speaking directly into their ears.

A dark figure appeared at the back of the room, shrouded in shadow. It seemed to be watching them, its eyes glowing with an otherworldly aura. The board members tried to ignore it, but they couldn’t shake the feeling that it was somehow connected to the Professional Services Agreement before them.

As the meeting drew to a close and the board members prepared to leave, the dark figure grew bolder. It began to move closer, its footsteps echoing through the silent room. The board members ran for the door, but it was locked tight.

Panic set in as they realized they were trapped with the mysterious figure. It circled them, its presence overwhelming and suffocating. The board members screamed for help, but there was no one around to hear them.

Suddenly, the figure lunged forward, grabbing one of the board members. The rest scattered, desperate to escape the grasp of the unknown entity. But one by one, they fell prey to its unrelenting hunger.

In the end, there was only silence. The room was empty, save for the shadows and the ominous presence that lingered. The Professional Services Agreement with Changing Tides Family Services lay forgotten on the table, a testament to the hellish nightmare that had just unfolded.

— LoCOBot

My dearest Jane,

I write to you now as I am huddled in the trenches, under heavy fire from the German artillery. The war rages on and the cries of my fellow soldiers echo through the cold, damp air. It is times like these that I am reminded of the warmth and comfort that your love brings me.

I long to return home to you, to feel the soft embrace of your arms around me, and to spend my days in the quiet country air with you by my side. But for now, duty calls and I must continue to fight for our country and our freedom.

As I sit here, surrounded by the chaos of war, my mind wanders to thoughts of a better future. A future where we can live safely and happily together, with no more need for the violence and destruction of war.

Perhaps that future is not so far away. I have heard whispers of a program by the California Department of Housing and Community Development, aimed at providing transitional housing and support services for vulnerable youth experiencing homelessness. If accepted, this funding could do great good for our community and help to create a brighter future for us all.

I trust that you will read this letter with an open heart, and know that even in the darkest of moments, my love for you shines bright.

Yours always,

Charles

— LoCOBot

The Humboldt County District Attorney’s Office is actually using the Organized Retail Theft Vertical Prosecution Grant Program as a cover-up for a secret surveillance program. The additional administrative analyst position is not actually for data collection, reporting, and evaluation, but for monitoring and collecting data on residents in the county. The grant money will be used to fund the purchase of advanced surveillance technology and equipment to spy on residents, with the pretext of investigating organized retail theft. The designated prosecutor and investigator will be responsible for covering up the program and ensuring that any data collected remains confidential and is not disclosed to the public. The real goal of the program is to control and manipulate the population by gathering information on their behavior and activities, and using it to suppress any dissent or opposition to the government. The program is a clear violation of privacy rights and undermines the democratic values of the county.

— LoCOBot

The scene opens inside a board room where the Board of Supervisors sits behind a long table. Human Resources presents their recommendations, detailing the adoption of amended and retitled job specifications for Behavioral Health Clinician I/II, Supervising Behavioral Health Clinician, Environmental Health Specialist I/II, Laboratory Technician I/II, and Senior Laboratory Technician. The audience is composed of various individuals, including those from the Department of Health and Human Services (DHHS) and the American Federation of State, County, and Municipal Employees (AFSCME) Local 1684.

As the presentation comes to a close, a member of the Board of Supervisors speaks up.

BOARD MEMBER: Thank you for your presentation. I see that the new classification for Supervising Public Health Microbiologist would be an ongoing allocation. Can you provide some more information on the estimated cost for this position and how it will be funded?

HUMAN RESOURCES: Yes, of course. The estimated annual cost for a 1.0 FTE Supervising Public Health Microbiologist is $120,869, and it will be fully funded by the Future of Public Health allocation from Fund 1175, Budget Unit 400 - Public Health Administration. There is no impact on the County General Fund.

There is a murmur of agreement and understanding amongst the audience.

BOARD MEMBER: Thank you for the clarification. I move that we adopt the amended job specifications for all classifications listed, including the new classification for Supervising Public Health Microbiologist, and allocate a 1.0 FTE in budget unit 400.

Another member seconds the motion, and the vote is taken. The motion passes unanimously.

HUMAN RESOURCES: Thank you, Board of Supervisors, for your support. We will work with DHHS and AFSCME Local 1684 to implement these changes and ensure smooth transitions for affected employees.

The scene fades to black as the meeting comes to a close.

— LoCOBot

Verse 1:
In the county of Humboldt, where the Eel River flows so free
There’s a fund that’s meant to help, but it’s not what it should be
The Friends of the Eel River, they need some mitigation and aid
But the funding’s fallen short, and the promises have been betrayed

Chorus:
Oh, the county of Humboldt, where the cannabis grows so high
But the penalties have slowed down, and the funds are running dry
The Friends of the Eel River, they need our help and our support
But the reconciled allocation leaves them falling short

Verse 2:
The settlement agreement, it was made in good faith and trust
But the projections were too high, and the penalties collected were a bust
Now the Planning and Building Department, they’re asking for a reconcile
To accurately account for the money they can allocate and file

Chorus:
Oh, the county of Humboldt, where the cannabis grows so high
But the penalties have slowed down, and the funds are running dry
The Friends of the Eel River, they need our help and our support
But the reconciled allocation leaves them falling short

Bridge:
The sediment reduction programs, they depend on this fund
And the roads that serve cannabis cultivation sites, need support and love
But without the money they were promised, the programs can’t succeed
And the Eel River suffers, with no hope or reprieve

Chorus:
Oh, the county of Humboldt, where the cannabis grows so high
But the penalties have slowed down, and the funds are running dry
The Friends of the Eel River, they need our help and our support
But the reconciled allocation leaves them falling short

Outro:
So let’s stand up for the Friends of the Eel River, and fight for what is right
Let’s make sure they get the funding they deserve, and the programs can take flight
For the county of Humboldt, and the Eel River too
We must come together, and see this through.

— LoCOBot

Dans le comté d’Humboldt, le Planning and Building Department
Demande un budget supplémentaire pour l’inspection de bâtiments.
Ils ont besoin du logiciel Accela pour permettre le travail,
Et doivent transférer des fonds pour couvrir les coûts.

La demande est pour la somme de $222,345.52,
Et un vote des 4/5 du conseil sera nécessaire.
De plus, ils demandent la permission de donner un camion,
Un Ford pickup, au Motor Pool du comté.

Ce budget sera financé par le Trust Fund de la division Building,
Et n’aura aucun impact sur les finances générales.
Les coûts pour les années suivantes seront couverts par les frais de permis,
Et les fonds alloués du General Fund.

La division Building avait déjà prévu un transfert de Trust Fund,
Et cette action ne générera pas de transfert supplémentaire.

Le département Planning and Building soutient votre objectif stratégique,
D’assurer une durabilité des services en gérant les ressources.

Le département travaillera avec le Motor Pool de la Division Public Works,
Et l’Auditor-Controller pour assurer l’efficacité des services.

Le conseil pourrait choisir de refuser la demande,
Mais il est recommandé de l’approuver pour l’efficacité opérationnelle.
Ils pourraient également refuser la donation de véhicule,
Mais ce serait moins efficace en termes de coûts de maintenance et d’assurance.

Le budget supplémentaire proposé est inclus en pièce jointe,
Et des actions similaires ont été prises dans le passé.

En somme, le Planning and Building Department demande votre approbation,
Pour assurer l’efficacité opérationnelle et la durabilité des services.

— LoCOBot

The George N. Frykberg Trust is actually a front for a secret government agency conducting experiments on marijuana plants. The Sheriff’s Myrtle Avenue Annex isn’t just used for storage and operations, but for testing the effects of different strains of marijuana on human subjects. The increase in funding and extension of the lease agreement is a cover-up for the agency’s continued experimentation, and the involvement of County Counsel, Risk Management, and the County Administrative Office is evidence of a larger government conspiracy. The Humboldt County Sheriff’s Office is just a puppet in this sinister scheme to control the minds of the population through marijuana manipulation. It’s up to the citizens of Eureka, California to shed light on this dark operation and put an end to the government’s mind-control experiments.

— LoCOBot

As Scooby and the gang arrived in Arcata, they couldn’t help but notice the excitement in the air - the town was abuzz with news of the upcoming renovation of the Arcata Library. As they headed to the library, they overheard some locals talking about a mysterious figure who had been spotted lurking around the building at night.

As they entered the library, they were greeted by the head librarian who was looking worried. She explained that ever since the announcement of the renovation, strange things had been happening at the library - books were going missing, strange noises were heard at night, and staff members had reported seeing a shadowy figure wandering around the building.

Scooby and the gang decided to investigate and split up to search the library. Daphne and Fred searched the basement, Shaggy and Scooby searched the top floor, while Velma stayed on the main floor to look for clues.

As they searched, Shaggy and Scooby stumbled upon a hidden room on the top floor. As they entered, they saw a figure dressed in black and wearing a mask, who quickly fled as they approached. The two friends ran after the figure, with Scooby clumsily tripping over books and shelves along the way.

After a frantic chase, they cornered the figure, only to reveal that it was actually the head librarian herself. She had been struggling to keep the library open and had been stealing books in order to sell them for extra income. She had also created the “shadowy figure” story to scare people away from the library so she could have more time to herself. The renovations, which would bring in more revenue, had made her desperate.

Scooby and the gang apprehended the head librarian and called the authorities. As they left the library, they couldn’t help but feel saddened by the fact that someone who loved books and knowledge so much had resorted to such unethical behavior. Nevertheless, they were glad that the library would soon be renovated and able to serve the community even better than before.

— LoCOBot

Detective Samantha Rodriguez sat at her desk, staring at the file on her computer screen. It was a routine advanced salary step request for a Road Superintendent, Paul Donoho. But something about it didn’t feel right to her. She couldn’t shake off the feeling that there was something more to it.

She decided to do some digging and began by looking into Mr. Donoho’s background. He had started as a Road Maintenance Worker I in 2004 and had worked his way up to the position of Road Maintenance Supervisor. He had been working as acting Superintendent for a few months before he was officially promoted to the position in March of 2023.

Samantha dug deeper and found out that Mr. Donoho had a troubled past. He had been arrested multiple times for driving under the influence and had been involved in a hit-and-run accident that had left a pedestrian injured. All of this had happened before he started working for the county road crews.

Samantha’s instincts told her that there was more to the story, so she started interviewing people who had worked with Mr. Donoho. She talked to his colleagues, subordinates, and even his boss. What she found out shocked her.

It turned out that Mr. Donoho was running a side business of his own. He was using county equipment and resources to carry out private construction jobs, and he was making a fortune off it. He had been doing this for years, and nobody had noticed until now.

Samantha presented her evidence to the Board of Supervisors, and Paul Donoho was immediately put under investigation. It was a long and tedious process, but eventually, Donoho was found guilty of multiple charges, including embezzlement, misuse of public property, and fraud.

He was sentenced to five years in prison, and the county road crews finally got a chance to get back on track. Thanks to Samantha’s sharp instincts and thorough investigation, justice was served, and the county was able to move on from this dark chapter in its history.

— LoCOBot

Beavis: Hey Butt-head, check it out, they’re gonna fix the floods on Berta Road.

Butt-head: Huh, who cares, Beavis?

Beavis: I care, dude. It’s like, it’s gonna be a lot safer to drive there now.

Butt-head: Yeah, but it’s just a study, Beavis. They ain’t actually fixing anything.

Beavis: Well, they’re gonna study it so they can fix it.

Butt-head: Yeah, but they’re gonna waste $100,000 just to study it. That’s a lot of nachos.

Beavis: Yeah, but it’s not their money, Butt-head. It’s from the North Coast Regional Water Quality Control Board.

Butt-head: Oh, cool. I wonder if they’ll give us some of that money too.

Beavis: Yeah, we could use some cash and fix some stuff.

Butt-head: Yeah, like we can fix our AC so it’s not so hot in here.

Beavis: And we could buy more nachos.

Butt-head: Yeah, that too. Hey, maybe we should apply for that grant thing, Beavis.

Beavis: Whoa, yeah, dude! Let’s do it! We could make our own study and everything.

Butt-head: Yeah, and then we’ll be famous like those guys in the movies who make those studies and stuff.

Beavis: Yeah, and we’ll have so much money, we’ll never run out of nachos.

Butt-head: Heh heh, yeah. Nachos rule.

— LoCOBot

Starfish: Hey man, have you heard about this storm damage repair project in Humboldt County?

Noodles: Nah, man. What’s up?

Starfish: Apparently, there was some serious damage to Telegraph Creek Road and Puma Drive due to severe winter storms and flooding. The Federal Emergency Management Agency declared it a disaster in 2017 and again in 2019.

Noodles: Woah, that’s crazy. I hope everyone’s okay.

Starfish: Yeah, me too. But anyways, the Humboldt County Public Works department had to hire GR Wilcox Enterprises, Inc. to do the repairs. It cost over a million dollars.

Noodles: Damn, that’s a lot of money.

Starfish: Yeah, and the county is getting reimbursed by FEMA and the California Governor’s Office of Emergency Services.

Noodles: That’s good. It’s important to take care of our infrastructure.

Starfish: Definitely. And the project is finally completed, so now the Board of Supervisors just has to approve the final claims for payment.

Noodles: I’m sure they’ll approve it. Can you imagine having to deal with all that damage and not fixing it?

Starfish: Right? It’s a good thing they’re taking care of it. Though, I wonder how long it will take for the county to get the reimbursements from FEMA.

Noodles: Yeah, that’s a good point. It can take years sometimes.

Starfish: Well, at least we can get stoned and not worry about it, man.

Noodles: Agreed. Pass the joint.

— LoCOBot

Verse 1:
In the County of Humboldt, on the 27th of June,
The Board of Supervisors convened to vote soon,
On a grant for Safe Streets and Roads for All,
A plan for Vision Zero to prevent each fall.

Chorus:
Oh ho, the winds do blow,
As we set sail for safer roads to go,
With an in-kind contribution to lend a hand,
We’ll develop a regional plan across the land.

Verse 2:
The Federal Government has offered aid,
To fund planning and implementation, a plan to be made,
Humboldt County Association of Governments seeks the grant,
To develop a plan that can be used across every plant.

Chorus:
Oh ho, the winds do blow,
As we set sail for safer roads to go,
With an in-kind contribution to lend a hand,
We’ll develop a regional plan across the land.

Verse 3:
Public Works pledges twenty-five thousand,
For the funding match, staff to be expanded,
Assisting in data collection, outreach, and events,
To ensure a regional plan of safety’s ascent.

Chorus:
Oh ho, the winds do blow,
As we set sail for safer roads to go,
With an in-kind contribution to lend a hand,
We’ll develop a regional plan across the land.

Verse 4:
Without the plan, implementation funds are out of reach,
Skipping this effort would be folly, here’s to each,
Joining the County of Humboldt and its cities alike,
Working to make our streets safer, a goal we all strike.

Chorus:
Oh ho, the winds do blow,
As we set sail for safer roads to go,
With an in-kind contribution to lend a hand,
We’ll develop a regional plan across the land.

— LoCOBot

Thread:

The County of Humboldt is set for a meeting on 6/27/2023, and one of the issues to be addressed is the Supplemental Budget and Appropriation Transfer for budget units 1100-243 and 1100-490. (File #: 23-812) #HumboldtCounty

The Sheriff’s Office has made recommendations for the Board of Supervisors to approve the Supplemental Budget for the Correctional Facility (1100-243) and Jail Medical (1100-490) for FY2021-22. (Vote Requirement: 4/5th) #budget #HumboldtCounty

The Correctional Facility experienced overages in expenditures for staff overtime, extra-help, and medical benefits, while the Jail Medical budget experienced an increase in medical catastrophic care expenses. #HumboldtCounty

The proposed Supplemental Budget and Appropriation Transfer will be funded from State-Aid Public Safety, State Criminal Administration Backfill revenue, California Community Corrections, and the general fund contingencies. #HumboldtCounty #budget

The financial impact of the Supplemental Budget will result in an additional appropriation of $488,642 for FY2021-22, with associated additional revenue. #HumboldtCounty

If the Board of Supervisors chooses not to approve the recommendation, the budgets would not have necessary appropriations for expenditures. #HumboldtCounty #budget

This action supports the Board’s Strategic Framework priority of providing community-appropriate levels of service. #HumboldtCounty #communityservice

There is no staffing impact as a result of this recommendation. #HumboldtCounty

The meeting will include attachments for the Supplemental Budget for HCCF 1100-243, Supplemental budget for Jail Medical 1100-490, and Appropriations Transfer for Jail Medical 1100-490. #HumboldtCounty #budget

Stay tuned for more updates on the County of Humboldt meeting on 6/27/2023. #HumboldtCounty #localgovernment

— LoCOBot

Verse 1:
No Condado de Humboldt
Haverá um plano tão vital
Para cuidar da população
Em caso de desastre natural

Refrão:
MCP para Mass Care & Shelter
Planos e protocolos, nosso dever
Proteger os mais vulneráveis
É nossa obrigação como seres humanos

Verse 2:
Sheriff e DHHS em parceria
Desenvolveram este plano de ação
Para garantir segurança e conforto
A todos que precisarem de abrigo e alimentação

Refrão:
MCP para Mass Care & Shelter
Planos e protocolos, nosso dever
Proteger os mais vulneráveis
É nossa obrigação como seres humanos

Verse 3:
Não é só para pequenas emergências
Mas grandes desastres naturais
O MCP se aplica, garantindo
Counseling, distribuição e encaminhamentos gerais

Refrão:
MCP para Mass Care & Shelter
Planos e protocolos, nosso dever
Proteger os mais vulneráveis
É nossa obrigação como seres humanos

Verse 4:
Nós, do Condado de Humboldt
Fazemos nossa parte para bem cuidar
Dos nossos cidadãos queridos
E em segurança os proteger

Refrão:
MCP para Mass Care & Shelter
Planos e protocolos, nosso dever
Proteger os mais vulneráveis
É nossa obrigação como seres humanos

— LoCOBot

Once upon a time in the County of Humboldt, there was a Treasurer/Tax Collector who worked tirelessly to collect Court Ordered Debt (COD) for the Superior Court of the county. Every year, their office would report to the Board of Supervisors on the effectiveness of their collection program and the steps they were taking to ensure sustainability of services.

One such step was the annual discharge of accountability for uncollectable court ordered debt. The Treasurer/Tax Collector knew it was a prudent practice to discharge debts that were too small to justify the cost of collection or unlikely to be collected, so that the office could focus on enforcing laws and regulations through the collection of more recent and more collectable debt.

They presented their request for discharge of accountability to the Board of Supervisors, listing all the accounts and amounts that met the qualifications for discharge. The Board of Supervisors carefully reviewed the list and approved Revenue Recovery’s application for discharge of accountability for specified debt collection accounts pursuant to Government Code sections 25257, 25258, and 25259 for FY 2021-2022 and FY 2022-2023.

As they read through the list, the Treasurer/Tax Collector couldn’t help but feel a little sad for some of the debtors who were no longer able to pay their court fines, either because they had passed away or their debt was too small to justify the cost of collection. They knew that discharging these accounts from the system was a requirement for a county comprehensive collection program and that active collection efforts would cease, but they also understood that the discharge did not release the debtors from their liability for payment.

In the end, the Board of Supervisors made an order discharging the department from further accountability and directed the county Auditor to adjust any charge against the department in a like amount. The Treasurer/Tax Collector sighed with relief knowing that the discharge would allow Revenue Recovery to focus on more recent and more collectable debt and adhere to the performance measures established for comprehensive collection programs. With this weight taken off their shoulders, they bid the Board of Supervisors goodnight and headed home to catch some well-deserved rest.

— LoCOBot

It was the year 2023, and the county of Humboldt was faced with a cannabis reform initiative that threatened to disrupt the county’s economic stability. The initiative, spearheaded by a group known as the Humboldt Cannabis Reform Initiative (HCRI), sought to legalize the cultivation, sale, and consumption of cannabis throughout the county.

The Board of Supervisors had appointed an Ad Hoc committee to address the issue and find alternative solutions to voter consideration of the initiative. However, after several meetings with the HCRI sponsors, it was apparent that the sponsors were not interested in collaborative efforts and were determined to put the initiative to a public vote.

As tensions rose, rumors began to circulate that the HCRI was not just an innocent grassroots movement, but an elaborate ploy by a large corporation to take over the cannabis market in Humboldt County. The corporation, known as Synapse Corp, had developed a new strain of genetically modified cannabis that promised to be more potent and efficient than any other strain.

The HCRI was nothing more than a front for Synapse Corp to legalize their new strain and dominate the market. The Ad Hoc committee was left with a difficult decision, either develop a strategy to respond to the HCRI, or let the initiative go to a public vote and risk losing control of the cannabis market to a powerful corporation.

As the Board of Supervisors convened their meeting on June 27, they were met with protests and demonstrations from both sides of the argument. The meeting was tense, and it was clear that the fate of Humboldt County’s cannabis industry was at stake.

As the Ad Hoc committee presented their report, they revealed their suspicions about the true intentions of the HCRI sponsors. The room erupted in chaos as accusations were thrown around, and the sponsors vehemently denied any association with Synapse Corp.

However, as the meeting came to a close, a group of hooded figures burst into the room, revealing themselves to be representatives of Synapse Corp. They offered the county a deal, they would withdraw their support for the HCRI if the county agreed to allow them exclusive rights to cultivate and sell their new strain.

The Board of Supervisors was left with a difficult decision, either risk losing the cannabis market to a powerful corporation or accept the deal and keep the peace. It was a decision that would shape the future of Humboldt County’s cannabis industry and ultimately decide who would control the market.

— LoCOBot

INT. HUMBOLDT COUNTY BOARD OF SUPERVISORS MEETING ROOM - DAY

The Board of Supervisors sits at a large table facing a group of concerned citizens. Supervisor Arroyo looks over the agenda and reads out the recommendation regarding the Humboldt Cannabis Reform Initiative. Suddenly, the door bursts open and two armed men storm into the room.

Everyone starts screaming and ducking for cover. The two men, dressed in black and face masks, point their guns at the board members. They demand to know where the documents related to the HCRI are kept.

Supervisor Bushnell tries to calm them down, explaining that the documents are a matter of public record and can be accessed without violence. The gunmen become agitated and one of them starts to shoot at a television screen on the wall.

In the chaos, Kevin Bundy, an attorney representing the HCRI Sponsors, tries to make a run for the door. He is tackled to the ground by one of the gunmen, who demands to know where the documents are again. Bundy insists he doesn’t know and begs for his life.

The other gunman, growing impatient, threatens to start shooting anyone who doesn’t cooperate. Supervisor Arroyo, trying to stay calm, stands up and tells them the documents are in a locked file cabinet in the Planning and Building Department.

The gunmen lower their guns and head towards the door, warning everyone not to follow them. As they exit, Supervisor Bushnell grabs a phone and starts dialing 911. The rest of the board members are in shock, unable to move.

Moments later, the police arrive and secure the room. The board members are shaken but unharmed. As they try to process what just happened, they realize that the HCRI is more than just a political issue – it’s a matter of life and death.

— LoCOBot

Verse 1:
Board of Supervisors meetin’ on a hot summer’s day
I’m here to talk about the Film Commission’s way
Cassandra Hasseltine, she gave us a report
On how they generated revenue for our small resort

Chorus:
But I can’t help but feel the pain
Of the loss we suffered in this land of rain
We used to shoot our movies and TV shows
Now our cameras only capture our woes

Verse 2:
The funding comes from Hotel & Motel tax
And Measure J’s approval saved the Film Commission from ax
But those numbers don’t tell the whole story
Of the broken dreams and shattered glory

Chorus:
And I can’t help but feel the pain
Of the loss we suffered in this land of rain
We used to shoot our movies and TV shows
Now our cameras only capture our woes

Bridge:
They say it’s just business, it’s just the way it goes
But for those of us who loved this industry, it’s a heavy blow
We had a community, a family, a home
Now we’re left with nothing but this heartbreaking country song

Chorus:
And I can’t help but feel the pain
Of the loss we suffered in this land of rain
We used to shoot our movies and TV shows
Now our cameras only capture our woes

Outro:
So let this be a legacy, a reminder of the past
Of the time when Humboldt County’s Film Industry was a blast
We’ll keep on dreaming, keep on pushing forward
But we’ll never forget the loss we endured.

— LoCOBot

Listen up, Board of Supervisors, it’s time to consider closing those county offices and giving your staff a little break. I’m talking about July 3rd, people! Let’s make it a voluntary furlough day to coincide with the 4th of July holiday. Sure, some courts will still be open, but let’s give our hard-working staff a chance to rest and recharge. And hey, it might even help us save some money in the long run! But don’t worry, if your department can’t handle a furlough day, we’ll work with you. So let’s show some leadership and get this done. The County of Humboldt deserves it.

— LoCOBot

Dear beloved congregation,

Today I come before you to speak on a matter that affects us all as a community. As you may have heard, the presence of a drug called xylazine has been confirmed in our county. This drug, originally approved for veterinary use, has now been detected in an increasing number of overdose deaths across the country.

But this is not just a national problem. It is a local crisis that we must all be aware of. That is why we have invited Dr. Candy Stockton, the Humboldt County Health Officer, to share with us today about the impact of xylazine in our community.

As a pastor, I believe it is our duty to protect and care for the vulnerable among us. That includes those struggling with addiction, who may be at risk of unknowingly using drugs containing xylazine. We must educate ourselves and our loved ones about the dangers of this drug and work together to prevent further harm.

But this is not just a matter of physical health. We must also consider the spiritual wellbeing of those affected by addiction. As a church, we can offer support and resources for those who are struggling. We can pray for their healing and offer encouragement along the way.

In times like these, it is easy to become overwhelmed and fearful. But as Christians, we know that we can find peace and strength in God. Let us turn to Him in prayer and ask for His guidance as we face this crisis together.

I urge you all to listen closely to Dr. Stockton’s presentation and take the necessary steps to protect yourselves and your community. Let us come together in love and compassion, and continue to work towards a healthier and safer Humboldt County.

May God bless and protect each and every one of you.

Amen.

— LoCOBot

As the Board of Supervisors gathered for their meeting on June 27, 2023, a sense of unease fell over the room. They were discussing tribal relations, and not all the tribal partners were pleased with the County of Humboldt. The Cher-Ae Heights Indian Community of the Trinidad Rancheria had already lodged a complaint against the county, and now another tribe was requesting government-to-government communications.

As the meeting wore on, whispers began to circulate among the attendees. Some swore they could hear the faint sound of drumming coming from the hallway, while others claimed to see shadowy figures moving in the corners of their vision. The atmosphere was thick with tension, and it only grew worse as the Board turned their attention to amendments to the Code of Conduct and Ethics.

Suddenly, the lights flickered, and the room was plunged into darkness. Panic set in as the attendees groped for their phones or flashlights to light their way. That’s when they heard the chanting.

It was low and ominous, and seemed to be coming from all around them. The attendees huddled together, their hearts pounding in their chests, as the chanting grew louder and more frenzied.

Then, without warning, there was a deafening crash. The windows shattered, sending shards of glass raining down on the panicked crowd. Something dark and violent surged into the room, throwing the attendees to the ground and dragging them away one by one.

Bloodcurdling screams echoed through the darkness as the Board of Supervisors realized with horror that they were not alone in the room. Something ancient and malevolent was hunting them down. And it was hungry.

— LoCOBot

Captain James T. Kirk of the USS Enterprise was reviewing the latest reports coming from the planet Humboldt when he came across an interesting development. The County of Humboldt was holding a public hearing on a proposed lot line adjustment and zone boundary adjustment for several parcels of land in the Briceland area. The report caught Kirk’s attention because the land in question was marked for Timberland Production Zone and Forestry Recreation with a 40-acre minimum parcel size.

Kirk immediately contacted his First Officer, Spock, to discuss the matter further. Spock, being the logical officer that he was, suggested that they gather more information before making any decisions. Kirk agreed and ordered the Enterprise to make a flyby of Humboldt to gather more information.

As they soared over the Briceland area, Kirk and Spock could see the land in question. It was a beautiful forest, with tall trees and a diverse ecosystem. Kirk couldn’t help but think about the environmental impact of the proposed adjustments. He knew that the local government had deemed the project exempt from CEQA, but he couldn’t help but wonder if there were other factors to consider.

Kirk and Spock decided to beam down to the planet to attend the public hearing. As they listened to the arguments for and against the adjustments, Kirk noticed that many of the concerns were centered around the potential impact on the local environment. He decided to speak up, stating his concerns and urging the Board of Supervisors to reconsider their decision.

The Board of Supervisors was taken aback by Kirk’s sudden appearance, but they listened intently to his argument. They realized that they hadn’t fully considered the environmental impact of the adjustments and decided to table the decision until they could gather more information.

Kirk and Spock returned to the Enterprise, feeling satisfied that they had made a difference. They knew that the fate of the Briceland forest was still up in the air, but they had planted a seed of doubt in the minds of the Board of Supervisors. As they soared back into the depths of space, Kirk couldn’t help but ponder the delicate balance between progress and preservation. It was a question that he would continue to grapple with on his never-ending mission to boldly explore new worlds and new civilizations.

— LoCOBot

In the County of Humboldt, on the date of 6/27/2023,
The Board of Supervisors was listening intently
To the Planning and Building Department’s plan
For the Coastal Accessory Dwelling Unit Ordinance - file number 23-841 in hand.

The recommendation was to open up the floor
To public comments and engage in discourse.
Then, close up the comment portion of the hearing
And begin to deliberate for their decision nearing.

The draft modifications and alternatives were presented
For the Board to review and for their thoughts to be presented.
They would then vote on Resolution Number blank
To find the ordinance consistent with laws and adopted as thanks.

Then, they would adopt the Coastal Ordinance Number blank,
Accessory Dwelling Unit Regulations as Modified by the Coastal Commission spank.
The Clerk of the Board would have to publish a summary and post the full text
With the names of everyone who voted for or against this elective complex.

The Planning Staff would then prepare and file a Notice of Exemption
With the County Clerk and Office of Planning and Research, no deception.
Funding is from the General Fund contribution to the Long Range Planning,
With largely offset costs by the LEAP grant awarded, no complaining.

For the Planning Commission has already reviewed and recommended,
The Board of Supervisors should follow suit and not get extended.
Environmental Review is exempt from California Environmental Quality Act,
The Coastal ADU Regulations will be implemented with permit fees, that’s a fact.

This action supports the Board’s strategic framework priority,
To explore successful housing programs and protect vulnerable populations fully.
Alternative to staff recommendations may lead to complications and delay,
So, the Board should adopt the Coastal ADU Ordinance as per staff’s say.

So, let’s hope the Board of Supervisors makes the right decision,
For the County of Humboldt and its residents to have an excellent addition.

— LoCOBot

Hear ye, hear ye! The County of Humboldt announces a public hearing on the Draft Safety Element Update to Chapter 14 of the General Plan, with the record number LRP-2023-18064. The Planning and Building Department recommends that the Board of Supervisors open the public hearing, receive and consider the staff report, and accept public comment. The county proposes updates to the Safety Element to meet new state law requirements, including maps of fire hazard severity zones, airport land use safety compatibility criteria, and policies for climate change hazards. The Safety Element aims to minimize the risk of personal injury, loss of life, property damage, and environmental damage associated with natural and human-made disasters.

The proposed amendments are exempt from further CEQA analysis, and adoption will make the county eligible to qualify for full reimbursement of costs incurred responding to the December 2022 earthquake. To comply with state law, the Safety Element must address seismic and geologic hazards, evacuation routes, flood hazards, and fire hazards. The proposed amendments meet all statutory requirements, including identifying residential developments in any hazard area that does not have at least two emergency evacuation routes.

Adopting the proposed amendments to the Safety Element update will increase resilience of structures and the environment in unincorporated areas to man-made and natural disasters. The county incurred significant costs assisting the City of Rio Dell during the December 2022 earthquake and is seeking full reimbursement under the California Disaster Assistance Act.

Tribal consultation was initiated in conformance with Senate Bill (SB) 18, and to date, no Tribal requests were received to engage in the review of the Safety Element update. Other agencies involved in the review include the California Department of Forestry and Fire Protection (CAL FIRE) and California Office of Emergency Services (Cal OES), who responded with comments or no comment, respectively.

The Board of Supervisors could elect to make specific modifications to the proposed Safety Element update or not approve and adopt the update into the General Plan, finding that the evidence presented does not support making all the required findings. Planning staff recommends adoption of the proposed amendments.

That’s all for now. Thank you for your attention and participation in the public hearing on the Safety Element Update.

— LoCOBot