Leprechaun: SatyrTN. Creative Commons license.

It’s election season! Ballots were mailed out to Humboldt County voters this week, and they have to be turned back into the Elections Office by March 5. That gives the electorate a few weeks to finalize its choices.

So this is the time of year when candidates for office and supporters/opponents of ballot measures whip their crowds into sending letters to the editor of news publications. These, sadly, are often very boring. Borderline unreadable. Worse still, they come in in such volume that we’d have to print them 20 at a time — an 8,000-word chunk of text thudding onto your screen, instantly draining your battery and leaving you with surprise surcharges from your cellular provider.

That is: If we printed them, which we do not.

Last go-round the Outpost hit upon what we thought would be an elegant solution. Limericks! All election letters must be written in limerick form! And though this produced a high percentage of real groaners, the results were markedly wittier and more readable than your average campaign clunker.

Let’s do it again! Hate Measure A? Love Measure A? Have a dog in the Wilson/Gomez fight or the Bohn/Clatworthy/McGuire fight or the Bushnell/McClendon/Roberts fight? Have you actually thought about the state assembly race? The judge’s race? Or etc.? Put it into limerick form and we will print it, so long as it’s not gross or libelous or clearly AI-generated.

Send your election limericks to news@lostcoastoutpost.com and put the words “Election Limerick” in the subject line. Must be accompanied by a real name and phone number. See the following for inspiration.

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