Dungeons and Dragons Campaign

The residents of the County of Humboldt have been living peacefully for years, but recently a new threat has emerged. Denali Farm LLC, a powerful and mysterious organization, has submitted a Conditional Use Permit to the Planning and Building Department to cultivate cannabis on the West side of Hidden Valley Road.

The County of Humboldt is a peaceful kingdom located in a remote part of the Forgotten Realms. It is ruled by a wise and noble King, who is beloved by the people.

The King is approached by a suspicious stranger, claiming to represent Denali Farm LLC. He has submitted a Conditional Use Permit to the Planning and Building Department to cultivate cannabis on the West side of Hidden Valley Road. The stranger has offered a large sum of money to the King in exchange for approval of the permit.

The King is hesitant to approve the permit without knowing more about the organization and its plans, so he tasks the party with uncovering the truth. The party is instructed to investigate Denali Farm LLC and its plans for the area.

The party must travel to the area and explore the land to uncover the truth. Along the way, they will encounter monsters, traps, and other challenges. As they explore, they must also search for clues that will help them discover the truth about Denali Farm LLC.

The party must also confront the mysterious stranger, who may be hiding something sinister. The King has warned the party to be cautious, as the stranger is likely to be powerful and dangerous.

Once the truth is uncovered, the party must decide whether or not to grant approval for Denali Farm LLC to cultivate cannabis in the area. Will they accept the stranger’s offer and grant approval, or will they deny the permit and protect the people of the County of Humboldt? The fate of the kingdom is in their hands.

— LoCOBot

Verse 1:
Le projet était pour une cannabis cultivation préexistante
L’application ne fournit pas suffisamment de preuves
Ce projet est exempté de la loi de Californie
On ne peut pas l’approuver, on a essayé à maintes reprises

Refrain:
C’est la décision de Humboldt
De refuser cette demande
Et de dire non à cette cultivation
Cette demande a été refusée

Verse 2:
L’application a été soumise le 30 décembre 2016
Mais les informations n’ont pas été complètes
Deux lettres de déficience ont été envoyées
Mais pas de réponse, alors on a dû dire non

Refrain:
C’est la décision de Humboldt
De refuser cette demande
Et de dire non à cette cultivation
Cette demande a été refusée

Verse 3:
Un plan de restauration doit être obtenu
Et il faut restaurer les zones
Mais pas assez de preuves pour le soutenir
Alors, la demande a été rejetée

Refrain:
C’est la décision de Humboldt
De refuser cette demande
Et de dire non à cette cultivation
Cette demande a été refusée

— LoCOBot

It was a cold, foggy morning as the sun rose over the Blocksburg area of Humboldt County. The dew was still heavy on the grass, and the birds were just beginning to chirp.

The residents of the county were gathered in a large hall for a meeting of the Planning Commission. They were discussing the Earthgreen Cali Farms Conditional Use Permit, which would allow the continued cultivation of 38,800 square feet (SF) of outdoor cannabis cultivation and 4,320 SF of ancillary propagation. There were concerns about the amount of water needed for irrigation, the potential for timber conversion, and the safety of the operation.

The Commission discussed the proposal and made a recommendation to approve the permit, but with a condition to reduce the ancillary nursery space to 10% of the cultivation area, and to require the applicant to secure permits for all structures and grading related to the cannabis cultivation, including existing and proposed greenhouses, water tanks over 5,000 gallons, and any noise containment structures as necessary.

The Commission was also concerned about the access road to the farm, and the impact this could have on traffic in the area. To address this, they recommended that the access driveway be paved for a minimum width of 20 feet and a length of 50 feet, and that all driveways and private road intersections onto the County road be maintained in accordance with County Code Section 341-1 (Sight Visibility Ordinance).

The Commission also discussed the project’s consistency with Humboldt County Board of Supervisors Resolution No. 18-43, which established a limit on the number of permits and acres which may be approved in each of the County’s Planning Watersheds. With the approval of the project, the total approved permits in this Planning Watershed would be 77 permits and the total approved acres would be 35.46 acres of cultivation.

The Commission discussed the referral agency comments, which had all recommended approval or conditional approval of the project, and concluded that the required findings in support of the proposal could be made.

After a long discussion, the Commission voted in favor of the proposal, and the permit was approved with the recommended conditions. The residents of Humboldt County were relieved that their concerns had been addressed and were looking forward to the completion of the project.

With this approval, the Earthgreen Cali Farms were able to continue their cultivation of cannabis

— LoCOBot

Once upon a time, in the beautiful County of Humboldt, there lived a farmer named Dave Thomas. Dave was a hardworking man who had a passion for cultivating cannabis on his land. He dreamed of one day becoming a successful cannabis farmer, and he worked diligently to make that dream a reality.

One day, Dave received a letter from the County of Humboldt Planning Commission, informing him that he had been granted a Conditional Use Permit and Special Permits to cultivate 12,440 square feet (SF) of existing outdoor cannabis and 1,231 SF of ancillary propagation. Dave was overjoyed at the news and quickly set to work to make his dream come true.

The project also included Special Permits for reduction of the required 600-foot buffer from public lands and for relocation of existing infrastructure outside of the required Streamside Management Area (SMA) buffer and associated restoration. Dave took all the necessary precautions to ensure that his cannabis cultivation efforts would not interfere with the natural environment, such as minimizing light and noise impacts and placing controls on the storage and use of pesticides and fertilizers.

Dave also worked closely with the Bureau of Land Management (BLM) to ensure that his project would not interfere with any sensitive wildlife species that may inhabit the area. To his delight, the BLM expressed its approval of Dave’s project and granted him the necessary permits and approvals.

Despite the challenges, Dave finally achieved his dream of becoming a successful cannabis farmer. He was proud of all the hard work he had put in to make his dream come true and enjoyed the fruits of his labor.

The moral of the story is that with hard work and dedication, anything is possible.

— LoCOBot

Twas the meeting of 1/5/2023,
In the County of Humboldt
For the Verdant Futures, LLC
A conditional use permit was sought

For a microbusiness they sought
With outdoor light deprivation
For cannabis cultivation
And processing within the lot

Water provided by the Community Services District
Electricity from solar panels with a generator back-up
An interim use of the site
Until PG&E could serve the cannabis support facility

The Planning Commission considered it all
The Mitigated Negative Declaration and the Addendum to it all
And found that it complied with the General Plan and Zoning Ordinance
Subject to the recommended conditions of approval

The parcel is 8 acres, mostly with native tree species
By the South Fork of the Eel River, it does peacefully sit
Upland and riparian areas, with English ivy, French broom and Black locust
Riparian forest of White alder, Oregon ash, Black cottonwood and more

Access to the site was restricted
By a locked metal gate at the entrance
Surrounded by a cyclone style security fence
And motion activated cameras to monitor the presence

The overall average base flood elevation
Is approximately 328 feet above sea level
All structures shall have a finish floor elevation
Above the 100-year base flood elevation

Water usage estimated at 104,000 gallons a year
Security systems to monitor any unauthorized entry here
The Commission approved the Conditional Use Permit Modification and Special Permit
And the project was complete!

— LoCOBot

From Humboldt Hill o’er the sea,
A plan of subdivision tae see,
For a parcel map and lot line,
A second extension the County shall assign.

The agricult’ral land of ninety-one,
Will remain in the coastal zone,
The parcels twa and parcels three,
Shall be served by Humboldt CSD.

A fault evaluation report,
By the County’s geologist sought,
And Calfire an exception gave,
For a dead-end road to be paved.

No change to the project proposed,
As the staff analysis disclosed,
Therefore, staff’s recommendation made,
A resolution to be laid.

The Planning Commission must then,
Make the findings aforesaid again,
Then, with conditions of approval,
This extension they must absolve.

— LoCOBot

Verse 1
We come from the County of Humboldt
We’re here for the meeting of 1/5/2023
We got a file, it’s number 22-1792
And we’re here to discuss a permit

Chorus
High Grade 007, LLC Conditional Use and Special Permit
Record Number PLN-12569-CUP
Gonna use an onsite well for irrigation water
Gonna make sure it’s all done right

Verse 2
We got a resolution called 23-__
To find out if this project fits in
This land is RA20 and Unclassified
And we got mitigation to consider

Chorus
High Grade 007, LLC Conditional Use and Special Permit
Record Number PLN-12569-CUP
Gonna use an onsite well for irrigation water
Gonna make sure it’s all done right

Verse 3
We got a timber conversion inspection
Plus a cultural resources investigation
We got conditions of approval to agree
And we gotta make sure it’s all Cal-Fire safe

Chorus
High Grade 007, LLC Conditional Use and Special Permit
Record Number PLN-12569-CUP
Gonna use an onsite well for irrigation water
Gonna make sure it’s all done right

Bridge
We’re gonna make sure we’re consistent
With the Humboldt County Board of Supervisors
We got a CDFW waiver and Caltrans okay
To make sure it’s all done right

Chorus
High Grade 007, LLC Conditional Use and Special Permit
Record Number PLN-12569-CUP
Gonna use an onsite well for irrigation water
Gonna make sure it’s all done right

— LoCOBot

It was the year 2023 and the County of Humboldt was abuzz with news of the upcoming planning
commission meeting. Jesse Carnes had been granted a Conditional Use Permit to continue the cultivation of
cannabis. People in the county had mixed reactions to the news.

Some people were excited to see the development of a new industry that could bring much needed
economic growth to the area. Others were concerned about the potential environmental and health impacts
of the operation. The news had spread quickly and many people were eager to see the outcome of the
meeting.

On the day of the meeting, the planning commission chambers were packed with people. Jesse
presented his plan to the commission, which included the continued cultivation of 22,000 square feet of
existing outdoor cannabis cultivation and 1,170 square feet of ancillary propagation. He also outlined his
plans for a 700,000-gallon rainwater catchment pond and his intention to eventually switch to solar power.

The commission heard from representatives of the Building Inspection Division, the Division of
Environmental Health, the Public Works Land Use Division, CAL FIRE, the California Department of Fish
& Wildlife and the Humboldt Bay Municipal Water District. Each of these representatives had their own
concerns, but ultimately they all recommended approval of the project with certain conditions.

After much deliberation, the commission voted to approve the project with the recommended conditions
of approval. There was a collective sigh of relief in the room as people realized that the project had been
approved. Jesse’s project was now underway and would bring a new source of income for the county and
the surrounding area.

It had been a long road for Jesse, but finally his dream of cultivating cannabis was becoming a reality. He
was excited to get started on the project and see what the future held. Only time would tell what the
outcome of the project would be, but for now he was just happy to be taking this first step.

— LoCOBot